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Your support makes all the difference.There’s a bit of a bizarre love pentangle situation on episode two of ITV2’s heat ’n heartache blockbuster. Twins Jess and Eve have parachuted into Love Island under strict instructions to cruelly wrench two of the boys from their doting partners. From the outset it’s clear they’ll pick Callum and Mike – and that Callum and Mike are very much up for being cruelly wrenched from their doting partners.
But Callum’s other half, Shaughna, is massively unimpressed and signals her disquiet by sucking the lips off her squeeze in the run-up to the big decision. Her demonstration of affection is loud, off-putting if you’re trying to snaffle a sneaky bowl of cereal and reminiscent of one of those face-huggers from Aliens. And it doesn’t do her any good anyway, as he’s all about Eve almost straight afterwards. Here are the other major talking points.
1: Love Island is in a bit of a rut
Banter, a kiss-and-tell game show, and a big choice at the end of the hour. Such is the formula to which Love Island has rigorously adhered across previous seasons and here we go again in South Africa.
The problem is that, as yet, the series has yet to cough up a break-out personality to make us ignore how predictable it all is. Mike, the likeliest of lads, is the closest to a star so far. But even he is essentially thoughtful and sensible. Good for him – not great for ITV ratings you suspect.
2: Do half the contestants even want to be on Love Island?
Leanne woke from her trance long enough to snog Mike during the tea-based kiss-and-tell competition (yes that is a thing). Otherwise she seemed perfectly happy in the background. Ditto Sophie, Paige, Cheatin’ Ollie, Connor of the wonder-teeth…. All are clearly appreciative of the free winter break in South Africa. But none is visibly burning up with desire to win Love Island.
3: Will Jess and Eve turn on one another?
Flickers of tension broke out between the twins as they weighed up which of the boys they wanted to pick (both fancied Mike). Obviously nobody in the real world would want to see sisters falling out. But unless a wedge of some sort is driven through their alliance it’s hard to see where the contrived conflict that is the lifeblood of reality TV will come from. Shaughna looks properly annoyed with Callum – but he had no say in whether or not he was chosen so a split there hardly yields oodles of dramatic potential. Winter Love Island is in danger of freezing over slightly.
The liveblog is now closed
Love Island continues every night on ITV2 at 9pm
Eve – possibly Jess – is sharing her thoughts with the rest of the girls. Shaughna can't believe that ladies will now be set against ladies. Now Mike has asked to borrow the twins "for a chat". Mike – we haven't even got to the first ad break!
Callum, Mike and Connor are grilling the twins. The boys are shocked Jess and Eve are students. Within earshot, Shaughna honestly can't believe they're all getting on so well. But she's "like a Power Ranger" so she will pull through. Because Power Rangers are known for their romantic prowess. Now it's bedtime and one of the twins has promised "not to make any rash romantic decisions". What's she doing on Love Island?
What do we think of the series so far this year? I don't know about Ed, but I'm finding it pretty dull. Barely any of the contestants seem to possess anything resembling a personality and Laura Whitmore seems very nervous in her hosting role...
Ad break! Time to draw breath and wonder what Shaughna being a Power Ranger might look like. Would she morph with the other contestants to form a super-islander, looming over Cape Town and chasing Laura Whitmore aand Iain Stirling back to the airport? Might bring back those missing 800,000 viewers, eh ITV?
Poolside the twins are discussing potential picks. Mike is top of their joint wishlist. Over at the breakfast bar, Paige is still trying to stay awake when conversing with Ollie. Apparently he cuts down trees as part of his job as a gentleman gardener. This is appropriate as, judging so far, he has a personality made largely of plywood.
Siânnise is miffed that the twins are sizing up Nas – who she DOESN'T ACTUALLY FANCY.
Where has all last night's negative energy between Sophie and Connor gone? Bean-boy "doesn't want to know" anyone else, he tells his partner. But hello...here are the twins and they've dragged him away for a chat. Sophie won't like that. Shaughna is even more miffed when Callum is likewise summoned. "Will I drown my sorrows or just drown?" she wonders. She is feeling properly threatened by Jess and Eve.
And now it's Mike's turn. They're rounding up every male contestant on the island! You can't question their thoroughness. "You're twins," he says, slightly redundantly.
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