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Love Island's back after an unacceptable 48 hours away. But rather than the hoped-for fireworks, this is a bit of a night of the damp squibs (that’s an innuendo only if you want it to be).
Tommy, it’s true, is on his way to becoming the official Most Boring Islander (Callum’s gone so the throne is obviously there for the seizing). Anton is still working that wandering eye “arc” by chatting up attached islanders (presumably this is the angle the producers have asked him to follow).
Oh, and Molly-Mae has invented a new word, Tam-Tom, which is what Anton and Tommy would look like if their personalities were placed in a Star Trek transporter and scrambled together. And that is it at the end of an episode in which sparks conspicuously failed to fly. Here are the big talking points. Well alright, the very medium-sized talking points.
Amber and Anton are going to end up hating one another
Did you catch the soul-shrivelling glance Amber threw Anton after he cheekily ’fessed up to using her razor? He continues oblivious with his pampering routine. But she looks properly not impressed. She also comes across deeply narked off at him during the game of Sex Jenga they’re all made to play. We’re calling it – an Amber v Anton feud is bubbling under but soon to boil over.
Danny is… absent
We’d been braced for new islander Danny to make his arrival. He has – cue faint but not insubstantial drum roll – featured in a Little Mix photoshoot and Sherif reckons he’s probably incredibly tall and charismatic. Well is he? Erm… no idea. He popped up right before the credits as it’s revealed that he and Yewande are going on a date. Great for Yewande who deserves more screen time. But Danny’s big entrance will have to wait.
Did you crumple up inside when Anna hugged Sherif out of politeness?
The pharmacist is not experiencing any funny side-effects when in the orbit of her partner Sherif. He makes his move by telling her she’s intimidating AND attractive. She is flattered, a bit, and they hug. This seems like a big deal to Sherif. Anna looks like she’d rather be back playing Sex Jenga.
Has Anton lured Molly-Mae away from Tommy?
What’s going on with the editing? One moment, Molly-Mae and Tommy are utterly cuddlesome. The next she’s confessing to the other lady contestants that he’s self absorbed and only wants to talk about boxing. Not a lot happens tonight and more could surely be made of Molly-Mae transitioning from Team Tommy to Club Anton. As it is, it feels like a crucial scene has been left on the cutting-room carpet. Oh well, it’s sure to be included in the director’s cut ultimate edition of Love Island we’ll all be rushing out for the moment the series has finished.
Catch up on everything you missed below:
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Molly-Mae, the newest contestant, is talking up Tommy's personality. Yewande is pretending to find Michael interesting. This is very boring. Can we have more sneaky love triangle conspiring please?
Breakfast by the pool. Yewande is telling Michael about her "phobia of small holes". Michael finds this a bit strange. It's ironic that Michael has studied chemistry as that's the one thing completely lacking from his love brunch. On and now Anna has a story about shingles she needs to share...
Breakfast still hasn't ended (please can breakfast end now). Joe seems to have undergone psychological conditioning so that he can only make small talk about sandwiches and other on-the-go snacks. Tommy, at the adjoining table, proposes that he and Molly-Mae have a secret word. "Chive is to describe when we both get a bit p***ed off," agrees Molly-Mae. "Chived" is the new "bevvy" but please don't tell Lucie. Or Joe, as he'll tell you that chive goes perfectly with pulled pork and a sesame seed bun.
Oh dear, the breakfast eternal is ongoing. Tommy is trying to make peppermint tea. Hopefully there will be no serious injuries.
Anton is proceeding with his designated role as the villa's very own wandering eye. Having spent his early hours in the house trying to lure Lucie away from Joe, now he's keeping a close watch on Tommy and Molly-Mae. He'll have his work cut out – Tommy is sharing with Molly-Mae his new fantasy of beating someone at boxing (he's a professional boxer – it isn't as if he randomly goes around thumping people) and locking eyes with her across the ring. Aaaaw...it's just like that scene in Notting Hill isn't it? (it's been a while since I've seen Notting Hill)
Ooh..Anton is making his move. He tells Molly-Mae he's drawn to her. "Thanks," she says, staring at her ankles. "Appreciate that". Early days but right now she is more attracted to her cornflakes. Which is probably why she keeps staring at them as Anton gives his pitch. Anyway, another ad-break and then a couples's game. It's been a journey but perhaps breakfast is finally over.
Anton has been cheeky and helped himself to one of the lady's razors. And it is not going down well. Anton is not fussed. This is how Anton rolls.
It's board game night and they're playing saucy Jenga. "Loved the Tower of Truth," says Lucie. She may be laying it on a bit. We bet she was really hoping for titillating Talisman or cheeky Carcassonne.
Nobody is really a winner playing the Tower of Truth. But the loser early on is Joe who breaks out in a sweat when questioned as to how many one night stands he's had.
Up on the roof Sherif has a few things to say to Anna. "Let me speak...let me speak," he says. Anna lets him speak. He reveals he is both intimidated by and attracted to her. She tries not to giggle and lets him nuzzle her armpit. In the confession booth, Sherif says he's trying not to get carried away. Us too, Sherif.
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