Love Island episode review: Danny’s troubling behaviour is further proof we should cut our losses

There was a lot riding on last night’s episode of Love Island. After three weeks of distinctly average television, people were just about ready to tune out of this season for good. But Sunday night’s preview for yesterday’s episode was too juicy to pass up: Snog, Marry, Pie.

Finally, a challenge that we care about. One that makes narrative sense. You snog the person you want to snog, propose to the person you want to marry, and smush a whipped-cream pie in the face of the person you want to pie (Love Island speak for ditch). As expected, the preview clip of Jake snogging Kaz to the dismay of BFF Liberty was purely clickbait: the scene lasted less than 10 seconds and ruffled zero feathers. Though there were a couple of chuckle-worthy moments, the challenge mostly fell flat. I remind you that this is the same challenge that in the past has gifted us meme-worthy moments like Belle going off at Anton (“Come at me with a ring, I f***ing dare you”). But while we can forgive a lack of drama, where we must draw the line is the total absence of banter. If Snog, Marry, Pie is a litmus test for villa vibes, the chemistry between this season’s islanders – and I don’t mean just romantically – is off.

This brings us to Danny, whose own disarming energy threatens to consume the entire villa. The newcomer’s arrival over the weekend was marred after a 2019 Instagram post in which he used the N-word resurfaced. ITV has ignored the repeated calls for him to be booted off the series and his first couple of days in the villa have done little to convince viewers that they’ve made the right decision.

It took less than 24-hours for Danny’s possessive fawning over Lucinda to turn cruel. In an attempt to “treat ‘em mean, keep ‘em keen” – yes, a 25-year-old man actually said those words – Danny took the challenge as an opportunity to pie Lucinda for “not chatting to him” despite the fact he’s been making her iced coffees in the morning. (On a separate note: when did iced coffee become some form of love language on this show?) It was worth it, though, to see Lucinda rise above and give Danny neither a snog nor a flirtatious pie in return.

Later that evening, Danny doubled down on the toxic masculinity. After being pulled for a chat by Lucinda, he told her – a girl whom he is actively chasing – that he is not the adoring type but rather the kind of man who “likes to knock you down a couple of pegs”. And with his sights apparently set on accomplishing a trifecta of outdated chauvinism, when Danny senses that Lucinda is about to break it off, he turns the tables on her and decides to position himself as the one who wants to “nip it in the bud”. Obviously, he does this by comparing Lucinda to a black Lamborghini that won’t start when you put the key in the ignition. You can’t make this s*** up.

Danny’s latest transgressions are further proof that we should just start from scratch. We’ve said it before and we’ll say it again: new boys in the villa, please.