What can you do as a man on International Women's Day? Here are some tips

This week, women across the UK have been tweeting pictures of their hands. On each hand is a postcode. Every one of those tweeted palms represents one woman; each postcode, a place they were verbally, physically or sexually abused.

This was the brainchild of the Women’s Equality Party. I’ve already outlined why they’ll get my vote before. Now Sophie Walker, the party’s London mayoral candidate, wants to create a sexual harassment map of London. Her aim is to show that violence towards women is one of the biggest challenges facing our generation, and it's working.

Twitter has been flooded with responses, but that shouldn’t be surprising. In 2014 1.4 million women suffered domestic abuse at the hands of the partner in the UK. In the same year, 31 per cent of women reported they’d been sexually abused at some point in their life.

In less than a week since its creation, the map already shows just how little the day-to-day interactions between men and women have improved.

In truth, what each postcode on a palm and pin on the map actually represents is a man.

These may be women’s hands stretched out in defiance of a ‘woman’s issue’, but it’s one caused by men. Men are the culprits, and it’s the men who have to change.

On Saturday thousands of women paraded through London in defiance of the abuse suffered at the hands of men. The message was clear: they’ve had enough of the catcalls, the groping and the rapes. They’ve had enough of the beatings, and they’ve had enough of being ignored when they speak out against it.

The march was, of course, peaceful. But when reports surfaced of men being ejected from the march, it’s all us men could do but complain.

“Why can’t we march with them?” Or, “Where’s our march against male abuse?” came the predictable responses.

And that typifies the problem perfectly.

For hundreds of years men have tried to tell women what’s best for them. It still seems to be the most difficult task imaginable for us to stop, listen and absorb what women are actually saying. Instead we issue a patronising “Calm down, dear”, turn the issue back to us, or mansplain ourselves to climax.

For us to decide we have a right to march with women against domestic abuse defeats the protest’s very objectives. Instead, in this and many other cases, we need to take a step back and listen to what‘s being said and, only then, ask how we can help.

Last week a company dared to offer women the option of ‘period leave’. A couple of days a month, if necessary, for women to take off work if their periods became unbearably painful.

Cue the men, and our utter derision at the very thought of a woman-only benefit. This despite the fact that women earn £300,000 less than men over their working life, just for being women.

Let’s be clear: these complaining men don’t have uteruses, or periods. Thus, we didn’t deserve or require a place in that debate. Our place, in that instance, was to listen. Then (and see if you can spot a pattern emerging here) ask how we can help.

If period leave isn’t necessary, what is? Did anyone of us even bother to ask?

For centuries, men have asserted their self-entitled dominance on every possible debate, discussion or dinner table discourse. We’ve carried out the lion’s share of the atrocities around the world, and those closer to home. We’ve done unspeakable things behind closed doors to the women in our lives and others besides.

When the status quo has been challenged, we’ve shouted down opponents and attempted to belittle women into silence.

Well, no more.

The women are talking and it’s time we started listening. We have to ask what they want and respect whatever comes as the answer.

It’s the least we owe them.

Happy International Women's Day, everyone.