Meghan may come to regret her decision not to attend the coronation

Does Meghan Markle regret not coming to the coronation? I suspect she might – though she may never admit it. Most of us put a brave face on decisions made in haste, or error; it’s hard work to accept that you may well have made the wrong call. Even harder work to say so publicly.

We will probably never know the truth, but it is fairly apparent given the optics that she might be feeling a certain pang of remorse now it’s all over: for the coronation was a triumph. One of the biggest events of the century, a slice of living history. One filled with affectionate family moments, as well as pomp and ceremony – just look at the role played by so many of Queen Camilla’s grandchildren, who joined the royal couple on the balcony.

That’s one of the saddest reasons for her absence – for it means that their children, Archie and Lilibet, missed out too. And, in stark contrast to the togetherness of most of the other royals was Markle’s husband – Prince Harry. He cut a sombre and solitary figure, walking down the aisle alone at Westminster Abbey. If he’d had his wife by his side, maybe he wouldn’t have looked quite so awkward.

Maybe he would have chosen differently too: he might have stayed on longer, rather than making himself notable in his absence on the balcony after the ceremony, and at the official celebratory lunch. “Harry who?” was the question on everyone’s lips.

His swift exit, according to reports, may have had something to do with wanting to get back to his wife and children – the official reason given for Markle’s absence was to celebrate their son Archie’s fourth birthday, back in California. Perhaps, if she had braved coming to the coronation, it would have gone some way to repair the rifts that have torn them apart?

It might even have gone some way towards reducing the distance created by the couple’s decision to step down from their royal duties altogether; or helped with making amends for the hurt caused by the publication of Harry’s memoir, Spare, in January.

In his book, the Duke of Sussex accused the royal family of a litany of wrongs, including details of physical fights with Prince William and claims his brother called Meghan “difficult”, “rude” and “abrasive”. Harry also claimed elsewhere in the book that his father, the new King, urged his sons to stop fighting at Windsor after the Duke of Edinburgh’s funeral. In a tense meeting, Harry wrote, a grieving Charles seemingly told his sons: “Please, boys. Don’t make my final years a misery.”

The title of the book refers to the idea of an “heir and a spare” – one sibling in line for the throne, with the other a “back up”. And Harry made his feelings on this particular matter crystal clear: alleging William and Kate encouraged him to wear Nazi uniform, and revealing that the now Princess of Wales made his wife cry in the lead-up to their wedding. He was also said to have called his role as best man at Prince William’s wedding a “bare-faced lie”.

Coming to the coronation must have been very hard for Harry. Facing up to your family once you’ve played a part in your mutual estrangement would feel insurmountable for anyone. Walking down the aisle in a public ceremony watched by millions, however – and doing it completely alone – seems almost unthinkable.

Meghan, too, has been subject to tense and unfair scrutiny by the press and sections of the public (and palace) for years. Her decision to attend would not have been easy. But I can’t help thinking she should have chosen differently anyway – made the sacrifice for her husband, her children and the wider family unit.

But she didn’t – and I fear she will come to wish she had. She, Archie and Lilibet missed out on the event of (quite literally) a lifetime: the crowning of a King. Why wouldn’t they regret that?