My son died in the Manchester Arena bombing – but I refuse to look back in anger

My son, Martyn Hett, was just 29 years old when he was killed alongside 21 other innocent people in the Manchester Arena terror attack, on 22 May 2017.

Overnight, life as we knew it changed for ever. As a mother, I had to come to terms with the fact that Martyn was a victim of a terrorist attack, process my grief, and continue to look after my four other children.

Martyn was a fun and flamboyant character who brought joy to all those around him. He lived life to the full, accepting people from all backgrounds, and embracing the values of kindness and compassion. Conversely, the bomber was indoctrinated with extremism.

I was overwhelmed by the collective response of the people of Manchester, and around the world, who came together to reject the hatred that had inspired the attack.

I was also shocked to find out that the person who carried out the attack was just 22 years old. How could someone so young want to devastate the lives of innocent people? How he could be so full of anger? I have now come to understand that this is precisely what extremist ideologies seek to achieve. They exploit young and sometimes vulnerable people, and use them to further their hatred.

Last year, the Home Office published statistics that showed there had been a 17 per cent increase in the number of young people charged with terror offences over the previous 12 months.

What’s more, the number of hate crimes recorded in England and Wales has increased by 37 percent, with more than 100,000 racist incidents. Now, more than ever, there is a need to be proactive and prevent more people from being radicalised. Hatred and anger are emotions that serve as enablers of this violence, but we can prevent this by intervening at an early stage. This is what has driven me to speak to more than 21,000 pupils in schools and colleges across Britain.

My talks raise awareness about the risks young people face online, and help children and young people to spot the signs of radicalisation, and know who they can speak with to report it safely. I want young people to see how they can positively shape their own world, and to think about the small acts of kindness they can do every day. I am constantly inspired by the young people I meet, their energy, and their and passion for having a positive impact.

No one should have to experience what the families and friends of the victims who survived or died in the Manchester Arena attack went through. Encouraging people to hold on to anger does not give us a way forward.

I know that holding on to these emotions will not bring Martyn back to me. That is why I will continue to visit schools and colleges around the country, encouraging young people to embrace the values of kindness and tolerance.

Figen Murray is the force behind Martyn’s Law, a proposed piece of legislation that would require entertainment venues to improve security against the threat of terrorism