The way Madonna handled her gaffe with a disabled fan only made it worse

Imagine: You’ve been getting into the groove (geddit?) all day ahead of a Madonna show you’ve taken out a second mortgage to be able to see. It is, quite possibly, the highlight of your cultural year.

But then you arrive at the arena, take your place – and the dream swiftly turns into a nightmare. For rather than having the time of your life, you find yourself singled out and humiliated in front of the thousands of other fans there with you, halfway through the show. Your misdemeanour? Not standing up and dancing with sufficient enthusiasm. Because, like me, you can’t. You’re in a wheelchair.

This really happened: on one of her performances during a five-night run at the Kia Forum in Los Angeles, Madonna was filmed challenging a fan for sitting down near the front of the stage. The Queen of Pop said into her microphone: “Take this ride with me! What are you doing sitting down over there? What are you doing sitting down?”

Then, after walking closer (while the audience cheered), she appeared to realise her horrible mistake: “Oh, OK,” she said, in footage that has been circulated since on social media. “Politically incorrect, sorry about that. I’m glad you’re here. Oh my god.”

Putting the extent of her mega-gaffe aside, for a moment, let’s just look at the language used by the superstar performer (who has been doing live shows for decades – and really should know better). “Politically incorrect”? Sorry, what?

Where was the sincere, full-throated apology? The signed set list, gifted as a sign of her embarrassment – and remorse?

Far from being remotely OK – or sufficient – I would actually describe her behaviour (and the comments made afterwards) as obnoxious. In fact, it is as fine an example of a non-apology as I’ve seen.

I don’t know how that person felt, but as a disabled gig-goer myself, I know I would have been mortified. In this country, you have to jump multiple hoops just to get a place in the often very limited number of disabled spaces venues offer.

Nor do the difficulties end with the ticketing – for while most venues try hard to make attending a show the joyful experience it should be, I’ve had some truly dismal experiences; including at one “inclusive” venue in London which gave our tickets away because we didn’t arrive at a predetermined time we hadn’t previously been informed of. No, I’m not kidding.

That said, Madonna isn’t the first performer to create the problem in the first place (she’s also been heavily criticised by fans for her lateness).

Kanye West has been there, too (of course). “I decided I can’t do this song, I can’t do the rest of the show until everybody stands up,” West told the Qantas Credit Union Arena in Sydney. “Unless you got a handicap pass and you get special parking.”

Some of those fans, of course, did have a “handicap pass” (ugh), but that didn’t stop their status being brought to the attention fo the entire arena. Nothing like a good public shaming, eh?

“If he’s in a wheelchair, then it’s fine,” the rapper said, after seeking verification from a bouncer. Wait, you mean that as well as filling out a bunch of forms, sending emails and generally incurring a severe headache just to get tickets sorted, we now have to submit proof of disability to the star?

Note to the Material Girl and to Donald Trump’s best pal: It isn’t a matter of “political correctness” or “wokeness” that stops decent people from behaving in a crass mannger towards their disabled peers. It is a simple matter of decency – and awareness.

Not everyone can stand up easily. Not everyone has a visible disability, either. And you know what? It’s not just the case with people in the disabled section. People get older. Bodies break down. And you need those older fans, because the kids are going to struggle to afford your prices.

Don’t get me wrong: I’d love to get up and dance. In my younger days, I was an enthusiastic stage-diver. I even once got maced for doing so at a thrash metal gig. However, while I’ll still happily wear a Metallica T-shirt, I stopped hurling my body into the air after a close encounter with a cement truck made the small matter of standing up a complicated and painful operation for me.

So, if you’re a performer and you really want those who pay through the nose to attend your gigs to show how much they love it? Do as other bands have done since the dawn of time and simply ask them to make some noise.