Jeremy Corbyn scored an own goal at PMQs that was so unlikely it was almost a masterpiece

In Jeremy Corbyn’s early PMQs days, he had a quite extraordinary talent of seeing an open goal before him and striking the ball spectacularly wide.

Eventually he would come to develop this skill further, and not merely miss but rush towards the ball, pivot through 180 degrees and fire it the full length of the pitch and into his own net.

So let it never be said that when history came calling, Jeremy Corbyn did not stand and deliver. For it was on this Wednesday lunchtime, still well short of 24 hours after Theresa May lost three votes in 63 minutes, one of which found her government in contempt of parliament, that the Labour leader delivered his masterpiece.

It was not so much an open goal, or even an own goal, but rather a shot blasted with such force towards his own net that it achieved light speed, circumnavigated the earth, struck him in the face and killed him stone dead.

Just to state again: Theresa May failed in her attempts to keep her own legal advice quiet, which we now know to be devastating to her Brexit deal. Her own attorney general was found in contempt of parliament in seeking to prevent its publication. Her own confidence and supply partners in government voted against her to ensure it happened. Parliament has voted to take back control of her Brexit deal, and in so doing, all but end it. By this time next week, all probabilities indicate Theresa May might find herself defenestrated from No 10, with not a single, solitary achievement to show for her time spent there.

This is the sort of thing that might compel an opposition leader to, for example, put out a statement last Sunday night saying he “would relish a head-to-head debate with Theresa May about her botched Brexit deal”. And here he was, in one of the world’s grandest debating chambers, the TV cameras rolling, the Brexit deal at its most botched point, and what he in fact relished was a debate on absolutely anything else.

None of it was mentioned. Not a whisper. For those among us becoming increasingly unsure about whether the last two-and-a-half years have or have not been a particularly vivid dream into which they have awoken and are yet to wake again, Jeremy Corbyn is doing no one any favours.

Instead we went on a typically pedestrian stroll around the problems of universal credit, the UN report into poverty in Britain – all of which matter, but they will matter as much next week as they do this. As we know, the purpose of Prime Minister’s Questions for Jeremy Corbyn is to shout some viral speeches for his social media following, but quite why whoever is directing those decided against even a fleeting reference to the collapse of the government at a time of national crisis is right up there with those mystifying moments of the Brexit saga.

Leaders of the opposition get six questions at Prime Minister’s Questions. It is probably coincidental that that is the same number of bullets as a chamber in a revolver, but it lent the occasion a certain Pulp Fiction feel, as each one flew directly past Theresa May’s head from point blank range, leaving her entirely unscathed at this moment of maximum exposure.

At one point, she laughed. Laughing at poverty is not a good look, but that will be a long way down the list of problems that will keep her awake at night.

At another point, she actually quoted the “there is no money left” letter, the one that David Cameron took round the country in the 2015 election campaign, rolling up his sleeves and whipping up entirely confected outrage everywhere he went.

These are serious times, and soon, the country is going to be looking for a new prime minister. If Corbyn wants to sort out poverty, sort out universal credit, he will have to sort out Brexit to get there. Even he is becoming aware that his position is becoming ridiculous. Arguably it is to his credit that some variation on the words “jobs-first Brexit”/ “single market deal”/ “exact same benefits of the customs union” did not pass his lips. He knows they are laughable.

But he knows it might still be him that’s laughing last.