Why do we accept pathetic ‘manscuses’ from misogynists like Dominic Cummings?

Dominic Cummings said he was tired of “dealing with stilettos from that c***”. The woman he degraded and ridiculed in a series of WhatsApp messages was former deputy cabinet secretary Helen MacNamara. She is somebody, he also added, that he would personally “handcuff and escort from Downing Street”.

Cummings’s illogical defence of his foulmouthed rants during the Covid inquiry showed who he is truly is: a powerful man lacking any sense of self-awareness or respect for men and women around him. He denies denigrating women and even claims he’s no misogynist because he treats men much worse (cue a collective sigh from women worldwide).

Ridiculous as his “manscuse” is, we have to admit it works time and time again for men. Misogyny (and yes, let’s call it exactly what it is) is rife in every section of our society including Westminster, the police, the army, the legal profession, the medical profession, finance – it’s everywhere. Yet, despite the evidence being clearly set out before us, so many still swallow the same excuses, lies and denials used time and time again. Why?

Cummings certainly isn’t the first man to deflect from his behaviour – we recently saw former Spanish FA president, Luis Rubiales, kiss Jenni Hermoso without her consent on live national television. Despite the world watching, he denied the action and shifted the blame onto the victim – a classic DARVO response (deny, attack, and reverse victim and offender roles).

Recent sex abuse allegations against Russell Brand (which he denies) led many to claim they had suspicions, but Brand was never called out. Andrew Tate made his views about women known. Jeremy Clarkson wrote an infamous column in the Sun, a national newspaper with a circulation of millions, saying Meghan Markle, a woman of colour, should be stripped naked in public and have excrement thrown at her while people shout “shame”, for which he later apologised. Laurence Fox described women who have abortions as heinous as rapists who should presumably be imprisoned – yet at that point he was still an anchor on GB “News”.

Why is misogyny allowed to be hidden in plain sight when it’s clearly so rampant? And is it really hidden, or do people just turn a blind eye? Do you remember in the Barbie movie when the businessman reassures Ken that they are doing patriarchy well, but they just hide it better?

Misogyny is hiding in WhatsApp messages, behind the scenes when others refuse to call out people in power, and behind victim-blaming tactics, to list but a few examples. One of the most frustrating places it hides is behind others’ excuses and minimisation of misogynistic behaviour, because it makes clear that his excuse is worth more than her right to be treated with respect, dignity and equality.

Why do men in power get away with this? The systems that uphold their positions of power are drenched in patriarchal norms that protect and enable their misogynistic behaviour. Let’s remember these structures were built by men for men – they are designed to preserve male dominance (and Cummings’s remarks towards MacNamara are steeped in language implying power over her).

The toxic cocktail of privilege and entitlement, coupled with a disturbing disregard for the rights and dignity of women, allows these men to act with impunity. One of his excuses was that he treated men worse! If that doesn’t make you scream – the patriarchy harms men too, after all – I don’t know what will.

If Cummings is unable to work with the UK’s most senior female civil servant without using abusive language about her, it seems to me he clearly shouldn’t be working with women. But where’s the accountability for misogynists in the workplace? Oh wait, there is none.

How many women leave workplaces because the gender-based discrimination they suffer means they feel vulnerable, targeted and unsafe? As a barrister campaigning for gender equality, I’ve suffered my fair share of misogyny from male barristers and I know exactly what it’s like to feel unsafe, unprotected and unsupported in the workplace – and for me, that’s just in the courtroom.

The blatant abuse of women undermines gender equality and fosters a culture of fear and oppression. In the interests of creating inclusive, equitable, and safe spaces for all, there should be zero tolerance for misogyny, and individuals who espouse sexism and abuse should be removed from any position or environment where they can perpetuate harm.

Misogyny isn’t an isolated attitude; it’s a pervasive form of gender inequality and discrimination that runs rampant in our society. It operates as a harmful undercurrent in our daily lives, devaluing and silencing women and limiting their opportunities. It’s a reflection of a deep-seated prejudice that sees women as second-class citizens – even women who hold significant power in their roles.

Eradicating misogyny is not just about promoting women’s rights, but about dismantling the very foundations of patriarchy that reinforce a racist and sexist hierarchy. It’s time we called out men who hate women.

Dr Charlotte Proudman is a barrister specialising in violence against women and girls and a junior research fellow at Queens’ College, Cambridge