The domino charade canard imbroglio

I have received many letters from readers about the brouhaha involving Stephen Byers, Jo Moore, Martin Sixsmith, and so on, and I think some of them are well worth printing.

From Dr Jack Wallright

Sir, I note that in your introduction to this piece you use the rather pretentious French word "brouhaha". Why on earth can't we use a good honest English word to describe the domino effect of resignations? "Fuss" springs to mind, as does "cock-up". Using words like "brouhaha", or, to take another example, "imbroglio", may betoken an educated mind, but they also betoken a closed and élitist mind.

yours etc

From Mr Winston Delatte

Sir, With reference to the previous letter, why is it that when several things fall over one after the other, it is always referred to as the "domino effect"? We at the British Domino League HQ are sick and tired of having our game mentioned as an exemplar of collapse. Dominoes is a serious and thoughtful game which gives much educated pleasure to many people, not to mention spring-cleaning the mathematical parts of the mind.

And dominoes are not the only things that fall over in sequence. What about audio tapes, books and milk bottles? I once accidentally knocked over a parked motor bicycle, which sent the next six bikes toppling one after the other – a much more dramatic spectacle than any pile of dominoes! But no one talks about the "motor-bike effect". What a charade.

yours etc

From Lady Samthrop

Sir, Permit me to utter a small protest at the use of the word "charade" to signify a useless process. It ill behoves a defender of dominoes to attack another game. Charades is perhaps one of the few unspoilt party games left, and we at the Charades Centre have been working to codify the rules so that when guests turn up for a country house weekend (yes, country houses do still exist!) they can be confident of the rules of this game which, at its best, draws on the finest British literary and theatrical traditions and is not just some quaint performance in a chocolate-box setting.

yours etc

From Mrs Adeline Wetherall

Sir, Oh yes, laugh at chocolate-box art all you like, but true students of chocolate-box art will know that there has always been far more to the pictorial aspect of chocolate packaging than the pretty-pretty thatched cottage approach. Did you know that Edvard Munch's tragic The Cry first appeared on a box of Norwegian fondants as long ago as 1936? You will find more sentimental art on ornamental plates and jigsaw puzzles (and, dare I say it, in the work of the painter Renoir) than on the vast majority of chocolate boxes, most of which these days sport sober abstract designs. Why, oh why, does this canard exist?

yours etc

From Mr Bernard Flute

Sir, May I deprecate the use of the word "canard" in the last letter? We at the British Duck Growers Association find it hard enough to take that the word "duck" is used contemptuously to mean a score of zero, without, in addition, the French word for duck being used to mean a foul rumour. Who, oh why, can the duck not be granted a little respect?

yours etc

From Mr Donald Sidebotham

Sir, May I congratulate all your correspondents except the last two for avoiding the dread opening to letters of complaint, "Why, oh why...?" Not only is it a ghastly cliché, it is a source of grinding annoyance for us at the regimental headquarters of the Yorkshire Old Yeomanry, who for years have been known as the YOY. Let's keep it that way.

yours etc

From Mrs Betty Jones

Sir, May I protest vehemently against the use of the expression "to welsh on someone", which is a direct slur on the Welsh nation? I realise that nobody has actually used the expression. I also realise that I leave myself open to charges of the Welsh being over-sensitive, and even having a chip on our shoulder. And it may be fair to say that we do go on and on about things sometimes. However...

Miles Kington writes: I am afraid that's all we have space for today. But do keep writing in to me!