David Lister: The Week in Arts

There have been two wonderful phrases uttered this week about the shenanigans at the English National Opera. But first a quick recap of what has been happening there. The artistic director, Sean Doran, has resigned. He had been appointed to succeed another artistic director who resigned. One was resigned by the hands-on chairman Martin Smith. The next was appointed by Mr Smith, but resigned anyway.

Mr Smith, you might remember, is the chairman who once described ENO's distinguished music director Paul Daniel as "the man who runs the music side of the business". Mr Daniel also resigned. And, oh yes, at Mr Daniel's last performance conducting, the company's own head of marketing stood up in his box and booed him, to the amazement of the audience. He, though, didn't resign.

With the resignation of the last artistic director some days ago, the plot grew murkier even by ENO standards. Despite the clear policy of the funding body, the Arts Council, that all posts should be advertised in the interests of equal opportunities and diversity, Mr Doran was replaced by a job-share of two internal candidates.

Newspapers are the last institutions that should lecture others on employment practice, but even we try to go through the motions of advertising posts before filling them with the people we had in mind all along. For a national arts organisation not to advertise posts, in clear contravention of its funder's policy, is breathtaking.

And so to the two quotes that made my week. The first is from the increasingly feeble Arts Council which said that as ENO has "an independent board of directors", it could not interfere. So that's all right then. The taxpayers can give millions of pounds a year to the crisis-ridden company, but the body that hands out the taxpayers' money can't actually enforce its policy because the directors are independent.

The second quote is even better. Mr Smith said that the board had to make an appointment immediately to avoid "an extended period of uncertainty and speculation surrounding these jobs". Brilliant. Of such logic are chairmen made. Any period between a top executive leaving and a replacement being found is by definition a period of uncertainty and speculation about who will be appointed. To avoid periods of uncertainty and speculation, never advertise a job again.

As it happens, a rather interesting pair of opera worthies had reportedly indicated that they would be interested in running the company together - Wasfi Kani who runs Grange Park Opera and Richard Jones, the world-famous opera director. They might at least have got an interview. They are two strong personalities, though, and not the sort that can be relied upon always to do a chairman's bidding.

One might have hoped for some intervention from the Secretary of State for Culture, Media and Sport, Tessa Jowell. But she has said nothing at all, presumably to avoid a period of uncertainty. It's not just a mess; it's a shameful slap in the face for the policy of equal opportunities and diversity that is the boast of the arts world.

And yet, does it matter to opera goers? That's the strange thing about scandals in the arts world. They're a bit like the intrigues in the courts of the Roman emperors. They didn't touch the public. And opera goers enjoying Anthony Minghella's ravishing Madam Butterfly at the ENO couldn't really care less who the artistic director is. In opera, where productions have to be planned years in advance, it takes a long time for messes to affect the repertoire. Chairmen of opera companies must be glad of that.

Some things don't travel well

Curiously, Mike Leigh's 1977 hit Abigail's Party is only now receiving its New York premiere. The reviews are enthusiastic, and Jennifer Jason Leigh, right, in the Alison Steadman role has been praised.

Some translation is needed, and The New York Times critic helps his readers by telling them that when the sardonic guest Tony says little more than "Ta" a lot of the time, this is "slang for thank you".

One piece of "translation" does puzzle me though. The hostess Beverly insisted on putting Demis Roussos records on for her guests, to the annoyance of her husband. Perhaps the large and decidedly untrendy Greek singer was never big in America, for in the New York production Beverly apparently plays Elvis records instead. Hmmm. I'm not sure about that. Elvis may have grown fat in his later years, and he may be of a certain vintage, but he has never ceased to be cool. He is certainly not the transatlantic equivalent of Demis Roussos. I wonder if Mike Leigh knows about this.

* Newspapers don't often get a mention in pop music. The Daily Mail received a name check in the Beatles song "Paperback Writer", of course, but the quality press tends to miss out. I suspect it is because the names are so long. Not easy for the songwriters.

But I am pleased to see that at long last The Independent features in a song. Belle and Sebastian have a track called "Act of the Apostles Part l" on their forthcoming album The Life Pursuit. The song is partly about a boy playing truant from school, and it contains the lines: "Took the fence then the lane / the bus then the train/Bought an Independent to make me look like I've got brains."

Can't argue with that. I suspect the first draft had the boy buying it to make it look like he had brains, taste, class and style. And it probably had him reading this column. But the abridged version will do.