Football: ELEVEN ASIDES

First goals: Dumbarton's William Melvin scored the first goal of the day, after just one minute in their Scottish Third Division game at Albion. The fastest goal in England was by Tony Bedeau (Torquay) at Shrewsbury after 6min 48sec. In the Premiership, Carl Cort of Wimbledon was the first player to find the net, as Egil Olsen's Dons got off to a flying start as they beat Watford 3-2.

First foreign goal: (Apart from making a lot of money.) Came courtesy of Chelsea's Gustavo Poyet, who scored in the 20th minute of the Blues' 4-0 win against Sunderland.

First fairytale: Bradford, who were making their first appearance in the top flight for 77-years, beat Middlesbrough 1-0 at the Riverside. Dean "two clubs per season" Saunders, who signed on a free transfer from Benfica, was the scorer.

First hat-trick: To the utter delight of one "special" spectator, Brighton's Darren Freeman scored three, as his team beat Mansfield 6-0. His goals came in the 14th, 20th and 70th minutes. Des was happy.

First Division: Charlton are the first leaders, following their 3-1 win over Barnsley.

First taste of the big time: Cheltenham were making their debut in the football league. Rochdale beat them 2-0.

First red card: Mansfield's David Kerr was the first player to be sent off this season, for violent conduct, in the 11th minute of his team's humbling 6-0 defeat by Brighton. Des really was happy.

First casualty: Referee Paul Durkin was an early sufferer when he retired in the 16th minute with a calf injury. Replaced by David Elleray.

First Jermaine to score: Jermaine Darlington, the QPR midfielder, gave the Londoners the lead against Huddersfield in the 16th minute. Nine minutes later, Wycombe's Jermaine McSporran scored against Burnley. The match ended in a 1-1 draw.

First Premiership leader: Gianlucca Vialli's Chelsea, following their emphatic 4-0 home win over Sunderland. "We could have scored more," he said after the game, "but that is a detail at the moment."

First excuse: "Today he [the referee] was a major part of the game and he destroyed it. I blame him for that, I blame him for the fact we lost." Ruud Gullit, Newcastle manager.