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Ex-NYC mayor Bill de Blasio and wife are separating – but will still live with each other

The mayor and his wife Chirlane McCray have been married since 1994

Abe Asher
Wednesday 05 July 2023 15:07 EDT
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Former New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio and his wife Chirlane McCray have announced that they are separating and will begin seeing other people but will continue to share their Brooklyn home.

The announcement, made in an extensive New York Times profile, marks the beginning of a new chapter in the personal lives of Mr de Blasio and Ms McCray — one of the country’s most visible political couples during Mr de Blasio’s reign as mayor.

Both Mr de Blasio and Ms McCray spoke extensively about their relationship struggles, memories, and plans for the future in the profile written by Times political reporter Matt Flegenheimer. But a number of observers online mocked the pair, both for the manner of their announcement and for its particulars.

“I can’t even imagine the ego it takes to arrange a New York Times photo shoot for your announcement of living together while separated,” Jay Martin tweeted.

Chris Gaun focused on Mr de Blasio’s housing arrangement.

“Even the former mayor can’t give up his housing deal,” Chris Gaun tweeted.

“They are separating but still living together? I couldn’t do it but that’s their decision, if that makes them happy I guess that’s all that matters,” Marcella tweeted.

Mr de Blasio and Ms McCray met while working for former New York City mayor David Dinkins in the early 1990s. Ms McCray then identified as a lesbian, but overtures from Mr de Blasio eventually won her over. They married in 1994 and had two children.

According to the Times profile, Mr de Blasio believes his mayoralty took a toll on their marriage. He also said he had lingering questions about Ms McCray’s sexuality.

“For the guy who took the chance on a woman who was an out lesbian and wrote an article called ‘I Am a Lesbian,’” Mr de Blasio said, “there was a part of me that would at times say, ‘Hmmm, is this like a time bomb ticking? Is this something that you’re going to regret later on?’ So I always lived with that stuff.”

Ms McCray, for her part, said she was not enthusiastic about Mr de Blasio’s short-lived 2020 presidential campaign — saying she viewed it as a “distraction.” Ms McCray said she was looking forward to a life more removed from the public limelight.

As Newsday reporter Matthew Chayes pointed out, Mr de Blasio is far from the only mayor of New York who has not had a conventional personal life. Current mayor Eric Adams is unmarried and co-owns apartments with two women, while Mr de Blasio’s predecessor Michael Bloomberg was divorced. The Times last year identified former mayor Ed Koch as gay.

Now, Mr de Blasio — after leaving the mayor’s office — will embark on a new chapter in his personal life, sharing space with Ms McCray but dating other people.

“There are probably millions of people doing this,” another person wrote on Twitter. “They may not realize it, or just don’t announce it.”

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