My Greatest Mistake: Anthony Noguera editor of 'Arena'
'I had been sent a suspicious ticking package. I put it on the publishing director's desk'
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Your support makes all the difference.I've been very lucky in that I haven't made any epoch-making mistakes that have changed the course of my career. But I did make a bad misjudgement a few years ago. I was editing FHM at a time when we had a spate of death threats from Islamic fundamentalist groups. The threats became so unpleasant that Emap was looking at putting security guards outside the offices.
I came back from a meeting one day to find a package on my desk, which was ticking. It had Arabic-looking script on the front. I opened it, and inside there was this old-fashioned wind-up alarm clock with wires coming off it, attached to two sticks of what looked like dynamite. I grabbed the package and walked gingerly through the office with it, in front of the whole team. I was going to throw it out of the back window where there was a derelict space between two buildings. At that point I became a hero – the team realised I was willing to carry a bomb out of the office for them. Then two of my colleagues owned up and told me it was a joke – some computer game had been released, and the PR had sent out ticking packages that looked like bombs.
Well, I thought it would be hilarious to play the same joke on my publishing director, who sat further down the corridor. So I wrapped the parcel up again and put a note on it, something along the lines of: "Die, English pig-dog! For your transgressions against Allah you will perish in flames," in mock-Arabic script. I went into the publishing director's office and he wasn't there, so I put it on his desk and told his PA that if he went berserk, she should tell him that it was a gag.
I went out to lunch, and came back an hour later to 350 people slow hand-clapping me. Every single person from the building was standing in the street. The publisher had come back from his meeting while his PA was at lunch, and he'd opened the parcel and nearly had a heart attack. He'd told the police and the fire brigade, and they'd evacuated the building.
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