Guilty Pleasure: Paul Brannigan on 'The Simple Life'

They were comic book characters. These visions from heaven would show up at the local bars, quite unlike anything anyone had ever seen. In one episode they thought somebody had stolen Nicole's bag and they trashed a pool table, threw drinks all over the place and just went mental like children. You felt sorry for the family because they had to pick up the pieces.

At one point they had them working in a fast-food place, and they were going out flirting with customers in pick-up trucks while dressed as giant hotdogs and flicking fingers at cars driving by.

I just found it hilarious: their lack of scruples, selfishness and the ingenuity in being able to get their own way. I guess everyone wonders what life would be like if you could get away with anything and that seems like Paris Hilton's entire life. We invited her to the Kerrang! awards a few years ago when she was dating a guy from Sum 41. I'm sure she was terrified being in the company of such a bacchanalian crowd. Being surrounded by heavy metal bands probably wasn't her scene.

Paul Brannigan is the editor of Kerrang!