‘Face masks are one of the most prevalent’: The unexpected triggers experienced by survivors of sexual violence

In 2021, the word “trigger” might seem overused, but it’s one we should take seriously nonetheless, particularly where sexual violence is concerned.

A trigger is exactly what it sounds like: something that provokes something else. When used in the context of sexual trauma, it generally means something that reminds the survivor of the assault they’ve experienced.

It can be anything, from a place to a person, and they can vary widely between people depending on a whole range of factors, including personality, and the kind of trauma that they’ve been through.

They can be hard to identify, too, before they’ve actually had an effect, which is one of the reasons why trigger warnings – used in TV and film to notify people that potentially harmful content is about to be shown – have come under scrutiny in recent years, with one study suggesting they might even make things worse.

What’s more, triggers can last for years. “Sexual assault is a devastating crime, one that has an immense, and sometimes life-long impact on survivors,” says Jayne Butler, CEO at Rape Crisis. “It’s important to remember that people cope in different ways, and whatever response a survivor had or is still having is perfectly valid.”

It’s important, too, to understand how a trigger can affect someone. Butler describes the feeling as “intense emotional distress” that can manifest in various ways, from panic attacks and flashbacks to nightmares.

As for the kinds of triggers people may experience, while they are all different, there are some that are more common, like being touched. “Things like going to the dentist, having a medical check-up, or being patted down by airport security can all feel incredibly intrusive,” notes Butler.

“Those who have experienced sexual assault have had their bodily autonomy abused and their control taken away, so to relinquish control to another person for any purpose can be really difficult and overwhelming.”

To deal with things like this, Butler suggests trying to take control of as many decisions that will be made before, during, and after the appointment as possible. “Things like leaving time later to look after yourself, asking to see a trusted doctor or nurse, taking a friend along with you, asking questions about any procedures, or for a run-down of what will be happening can all be helpful in preparing yourself for any triggers,” she says.

One specific type of touching which may be particularly triggering for women is that which occurs during a gynaecology appointment. Psychotherapist Rachel Buchan suggests getting in touch ahead of time and requesting t to see someone who understands, and is sensitive to, trauma. “If it feels OK for you, don’t be worried to say that, because of your history, you’d like to be examined by someone who will be sensitive to a previous trauma that makes gynaecological examinations difficult for you,” she says. “You don’t have to be specific about the why.”

Sensory triggers can be common, too. Whether it’s seeing someone in the street who looks like your perpetrator, or the smell and taste of a drink you consumed around that time, or even a specific song that was playing.

“These types of triggers can be particularly hard to deal with because they are not easy to plan for; they can come completely out of the blue,” says Butler, who suggests employing grounding techniques to cope.

“Grounding can help bring you to the present moment and create a sense of safety in knowing that these feelings are associated with a memory rather than what is happening now,” she says.

“There are mental grounding techniques such as saying the alphabet backwards, doing times tables or thinking about a happy memory or safe place, as well as physical grounding techniques such as focusing on your breathing, touching or gripping objects around you or tensing and releasing your fists.”

There are more unexpected triggers, of course, some of which have only arisen due to the pandemic. One of these is face masks. “It’s one of the most prevalent ones we have come across recently,” says Butler. “Many rape survivors had their mouths or noses covered, or were choked or smothered, as part of the abuse and violence they experienced, so wearing a mask can be extremely stressful.”

These feelings can be exacerbated by the anxiety regarding how you will be perceived for not wearing a mask. In these instances, practical tips that may alleviate these feelings include putting calming scents on your mask, or practising wearing them before going out and trialling different materials. “It’s also important to note that survivors who experience severe distress when wearing a face mask are exempt from doing so,” adds Butler.

One of the things that many survivors find difficult is the process of entering into a new relationship or being physically intimate with an existing partner. Ammanda Major, head of service quality and clinical practise at Relate, explains that it’s very natural for anyone who has experienced trauma to want to return to “normal life” as soon as possible.

“But where you’ve been the victim of a sexual assault it’s so important to go at the pace that suits you and not feel under any pressure from a potential new partner to do more than feels comfortable,” she adds.

Communication is vital when it comes to managing any feelings of anxiety with a partner, particularly if it’s someone new. However, that doesn’t necessarily mean sharing your experience of sexual assault with that person if you don’t feel comfortable doing so.

“Starting that conversation may take time and you need to feel fully in control of when, where and how you share what’s most important for you for your new partner to know,” says Major.

There will be extra considerations to be had if the assault was recent and police or other agencies were involved, all of which, Major points out, can affect how much you feel able to share with a new or existing partner.

“Even if the assault took place some time ago, it’s still very important that a partner understands that experiences like this are not time-limited, and even when years have passed, a partner can unwittingly trigger something that puts you right back in touch with what happened,” adds Major. “That’s why feeling comfortable to share what particular triggers for you might be, can potentially reduce that happening and start to create that safe space.”

Ultimately, it’s crucial to note that recovering from sexual trauma can be a slow and painful process. “Always remember that recovery comes in stages and it may sometimes be a case of taking two steps forward and three back,” says Major. “Getting the support you need both from a partner and maybe from a counsellor specialising in sexual trauma work may help you to rebuild trust and move forward.”

Shameless! Festival takes place on Saturday 27 November and is produced by SHaME (Sexual Harms and Medical Encounters) and WOW – Women of the World, and is supported by The Wellcome Trust and Birkbeck, University of London. Book tickets here