Woman sparks debate after wearing white to her sister’s wedding

‘It seems odd to me that you wouldn’t discuss what you plan to wear with her prior to her wedding, is there a lack of closeness between you?’ commenter questioned

Brittany Miller
New York
Sunday 28 January 2024 10:55 EST
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Related: Toilet paper wedding dress

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The debate about the appropriateness of wearing white to a wedding has been reignited after a woman revealed that she wore the bridal colour to her sister’s nuptials.

In a recent Reddit post shared to the popular “Am I The A**hole?” subreddit, a bride’s sister explained that she wore white to her sister’s wedding and thought it would be acceptable.

“I wore a white shirt and black pants to her wedding, like most of the men there,” she explained in her post. “The dress code for the wedding was formal and women can’t wear white but I thought it’d be okay because I wasn’t wearing a dress.”

Unfortunately, the woman said her sister did end up becoming upset with her, making the claim that attention was “stolen from her” because both of them were wearing white.

“I didn’t stand out at all. I was wearing a plain shirt and black pants. I blended in with other people. I didn’t mean to upset her though I honestly thought it would be okay,” the Reddit post concluded.

In response to the post, many people took to the comments to weigh in, with some finding flaws in both arguments.

“Nobody is going to mistake a woman in a white shirt and black pants for the bride. I think the whole ‘you wore white-how dare you’ thing is a red herring,” one comment began.

“Your sister is upset because the dress code was ‘formal’ and you were dressed like all the men. Your sister obviously expected to see you in a dress, or at least a fancy formal pantsuit, and you didn’t comply.”

One commenter suggested that other things were involved besides simply just wearing white.

“It seems odd to me that you wouldn’t discuss what you plan to wear with her prior to her wedding, is there a lack of closeness between you? The fact that she’s your sister and she’s being petty / holding a grudge about this, and that you didn’t discuss or show her what you were gonna wear beforehand, tells me that there’s some deeper issue at root here. It’s possible that whatever you wore she’d have found a reason to justify resentment for it. It seems like the resentment was already there,” the comment read.

Some people thought the problem could’ve been what was determined as ‘formal wear’ and what wasn’t.

“Honestly, black pants and a white shirt sound kind of like what waiters / servers would wear, since presumably the men were also wearing suit jackets. Sometimes ‘formal wear’ for women means a long dress (example: ankle-length satin or sparkly dress in a jewel tone) so it’s unclear if your shirt being white was the only problem with your outfit and your sister’s expectations,” one comment began.

“NTA for wearing a white shirt, but perhaps a little bit of a YTA if you didn’t plan an outfit beforehand and run it by your sister to check on if it complied with the general dress code.”

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