Woman defended after wearing ‘gold’ outfit to friend’s wedding

‘The only etiquette is not to wear white or ivory,’ one person responds on Reddit

Amber Raiken
New York
Monday 25 March 2024 23:37 EDT
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Related: Herd of ghosts interrupt couple’s wedding photo

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A woman has been defended from criticism over the dress she wore to a wedding.

In a recent post shared to the popular “Am I The A**hole?” Reddit forum, one woman asked if she was in the wrong for wearing the dress, which is described as gold in quotation marks because she thought the outfit was “more bronze/orange”.

She then gave context about the situation, noting that her best friend Dan was getting married to a woman, Lauren, who has “always disliked” her. The Reddit user then claimed that she hasn’t been able to hang out with her friend alone in the last three years, due to his relationship.

“Despite me being happily married, she’s always kept me at arm’s length,” she wrote about his friend’s partner. “Dan has spoken to her multiple times, and after she’ll back off for a bit, before reverting to complaining about him being friends with a girl again.”

She then explained that she was originally in the “groom’s party” for her friend’s wedding. However, the bride took issue with the idea, prompting the woman to agree to just attend the wedding as a guest.

According to the Reddit poster, the dress code was a “warm tone garden party”, where guests “were encouraged to wear earthy warm colours”.

“I picked out a bronze / orange dress that I thought fit this perfectly and the style even matched some examples they gave, in short, I thought I had nailed it,” she explained.

She then shared that while the wedding was “great,” the bride took an issue with the seemingly bronze and orange dress at the reception, prompting the wedding guest to leave.

“[The bride] said, ‘I cannot believe you would wear gold to my wedding, you’re not the first prize you’re just f***ing trashy,’” she continued. “I was so shocked in the moment I just stared at her. She practically screamed at me to leave and she was drawing attention so I grabbed my husband, said goodbye to Dan, and left.”

She noted that the groom later told her that he was “upset” about her leaving the wedding early. She added that the bride’s mother texted her and accused her of “ruining the wedding,” and claimed that she “was stupid for wearing a gold dress,” as that is “as bad as wearing white”.

The Reddit post has quickly gone viral, with more than 3,000 upvotes. In the comments, many people came to her defence, noting that her dress appeared to meet the standard dress code for the wedding, since it wasn’t white.

“Honestly this dress is such a normal dress with respect to current fashion. If you’re in your 30s at a wedding in America, a guest is wearing a dress like this,” one wrote. “I’d bet there were other people in similar dresses at that wedding even.”

“That dress is NOWHERE close to gold, and even if it was gold it DOES NOT MATTER. The only etiquette is not to wear white or ivory,” another added. “It’s not ‘a thing’ by any stretch of the imagination. You were not in the wrong.”

The Redditer posted the link to the dress in the comments
The Redditer posted the link to the dress in the comments (Hello Molly)

Other people shared their belief that the dress wasn’t the issue, with claims that the bride already appeared to have problems with the Reddit poster. Readers also shared their advice on how the woman can handle the situation with the groom.

“I don’t think it would have mattered what colour your dress was. The (now) wife hates you and was gonna find something to yell at you for whatever you wore. If it wasn’t the dress colour, it would have been something else,” one wrote. “Tell your friend why you left early, and make sure he knows how his wife treats you.”

“You need to be honest with Dan. Tell him that you would have loved to stay longer but you weren’t going to be yelled at and accused of trying to upstage his new wife and make more of a scene. And that was never your intention,” another commented. “And that until he can verify that you won’t be attacked for breathing in his presence you are going to step back.”

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