Woman calls out Tinder date for ‘gaslighting’ his mother: ‘It’s just so blatant’

‘Red flags right away,’ one respondent writes in the comments

Amber Raiken
New York
Wednesday 09 March 2022 10:18 EST
Comments
(@trashstarrxx/TikTok)

Your support helps us to tell the story

From reproductive rights to climate change to Big Tech, The Independent is on the ground when the story is developing. Whether it's investigating the financials of Elon Musk's pro-Trump PAC or producing our latest documentary, 'The A Word', which shines a light on the American women fighting for reproductive rights, we know how important it is to parse out the facts from the messaging.

At such a critical moment in US history, we need reporters on the ground. Your donation allows us to keep sending journalists to speak to both sides of the story.

The Independent is trusted by Americans across the entire political spectrum. And unlike many other quality news outlets, we choose not to lock Americans out of our reporting and analysis with paywalls. We believe quality journalism should be available to everyone, paid for by those who can afford it.

Your support makes all the difference.

A woman has called a man from Tinder out for “gaslighting” his mom during their date.

In a video shared to TikTok on 4 March, Starr, @trashstarrxx, could be seen recording herself, as she’s listening in to another person’s phone call. The TikToker also appears to be sitting in a car.

“On a tinder date listening to this man gaslight his mother,” the text over the video reads.

As noted by Merriam-Webster, gaslighting is a form of “psychological manipulation,” causing the victim to “question the validity of their own thoughts.”

In the clip, the man could be heard telling his mom that he “said yes in the beginning,” although her didn’t specify what he agreed to. His mother, who was talking to him through the phone, said: “OK, alright so.”

The man then cut her off and asked her how she had forgotten what he said.

“You and I, we kind of talked with each other back and forth,” the mom responded. The Tinder date emphasised again that he “said yes a long time ago.”

“You sound crazy right now,” he told his mother. “Are you forgetting things?”

After telling him that she was “not forgetting things,” he said: “Are you OK though? For real, because I said yes from the beginning.”

The mom said that she “never” recalled her son “ever saying yes.”

“I recall you b****ing a lot,” she added.

As of 8 March, the video has over 405,500 views, with viewers in the comments encouraging Starr not to go on a second date with him.

“No way,” a comment reads. “You’re lucky you witnessed this early.”

“The way he’s treating his mother is how he’s going to treat you RUN,” one viewer wrote, while another said: “The way he treats his mother is a way he’ll treat you, grams told me that at 11.”

Other viewers emphasised how appalling the man’s behaviour was and sympathised with the mother.

“But why is he on speakerphone with his mom on his date,” one TikTok user wrote.

“Oh nah, can’t be disrespecting mama now,’’ another viewer said.

The Independent has reached out to Starr for comment.

Join our commenting forum

Join thought-provoking conversations, follow other Independent readers and see their replies

Comments

Thank you for registering

Please refresh the page or navigate to another page on the site to be automatically logged inPlease refresh your browser to be logged in