Robert Downey Jr’s wife Susan Downey reveals key to their successful marriage

‘Iron Man’ star and his wife have been married for nearly two decades

Brittany Miller
New York
Thursday 14 March 2024 12:54 EDT
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Related: Oscars 2024: Robert Downey Jr wins Best Supporting Actor for Oppenheimer role

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Robert Downey Jr and his wife Susan Downey have revealed the secret to their 18-year marriage.

In an interview with People on Thursday 14 March, Susan shared the key to maintaining a happy marriage for nearly two decades: never keeping their family apart for more than two weeks.

“We do have a two-week rule, which often feels too long, but we don’t go more than two weeks without seeing each other and the family being together,” she told the outlet. “Fortunately, we prefer to be a travelling circus when we can be.”

Although, this doesn’t mean the rule comes without some potential discrepancies, such as when her husband is acting in movies. “You keep the basic rule of two weeks, and then you don’t try and think too far ahead, because so much of what we do is oddly unpredictable,” Susan said. “You just never know.”

She continued: “Someone might get sick, or there might be a shutdown, or this or that. So you just have to have some basic things in place, and then you have to be willing to flow with the rest of it.”

As for Robert, he admitted that he enjoys being at home and what it adds to his life. “It just gives me, honestly, something to attach my neurosis to that’s positive,” he told People.

Although Susan added that because she is a producer and not an actor, she has a lot more flexibility with her schedule. “The good news is I’m not in front of the camera, and so as a producer I end up with a little bit more flexibility in terms of location, of where I would need to be,” she said.

“I really admire and have a lot of empathy for couples who both have to be in front of the camera, because you get stuck and you have to make those choices,” Susan added.

The actor - who has starred as Tony Stark, aka Iron Man, in 10 Marvel Cinematic Universe films between 2008 and 2019, took home the prize for Best Supporting Actor at the Academy Awards on Sunday 10 March. Robert won the award for his role as politician Lewis Strauss in Christopher Nolan’s biographical thriller, Oppenheimer. The movie was widely heralded as a comeback for Robert, who had taken on only a handful of non-MCU projects over the past decade.

In his speech, Robert said: “Here’s my little secret: I needed this job more than it needed me. Chris [Nolan] knew it, [producer Emma Thomas] made sure that she surrounded me with one of the greatest cast and crews of all time.”

Paying tribute to co-stars Emily Blunt, Cillian Murphy, and Matt Damon, he continued: “Emily, Cillian, Matt... it was fantastic and I stand here before you a better man because of it. You know, what we do is meaningful, and the stuff that we decide to make is important.”

In August 2023, Robert and his wife celebrated their 18th wedding anniversary. Taking to Instagram, the Sherlock Holmes star shared a photo of the couple recreating their wedding photo from 2005. “18 years, love still in bloom!!” he captioned the post.

The couple met on the set of the 2003 film Gothika, in which Robert starred opposite Halle Berry and Penélope Cruz. At the time, Susan was working as a producer on the film. He proposed to Susan after three months of dating and they tied the knot two years later.

Along with sharing a production company together, called Team Downey, the pair also share two children: son Exton, 12, and daughter Avri, nine. The actor also shares son Indio, 30, with his first wife Deborah Falconer.

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