Dinner guests charged by hosts for meal after the fact

‘I am confused,’ Reddit user writes

Olivia Hebert
Los Angeles
Wednesday 03 January 2024 21:17 EST
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Dinner guests charged by hosts for meal after the fact
Dinner guests charged by hosts for meal after the fact (Getty Images)

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Dinner guests were shocked to find out that their hosts were charging them the next day.

In a post to the Am I the ***hole Reddit forum, a user explained that they had been invited over to a dinner through a mutual friend, and showed up to the evening with a gift of chocolates. They explained that the next day they had been told that the hosts wanted him to pay for the meal after the fact.

“I got invited to a dinner yesterday,” they started the post. “It was through a mutual friend. So I had not met or knew the hosts. But I am good friends with the mutual.”

They continued, “Anyway I gave them chocolate as a gesture of goodwill since they were hosting (cost £12). I believe that was the right thing, either that or wine. But anyway then today I got asked to pay for £13.70. I am confused.”

The user added their mutual friend insisted they come with him to the gathering, and the hosts would like him to be there as well. They wrote, “Initially between me and mutual, I said I was fine with not coming since I did not know them, so I didn’t mind. He then said that they would like me to come.”

“So I thought alright might as well since they insisted, I was excited as well,” they continued. “One thing to note: they said they (the hosts) had already bought the food as well. The food was nice. I appreciate the gesture. But asking to then pay after? I was not made aware of this.”

They asked Reddit for advice on the awkward situation, with many writing that it was “rude” that the hosts didn’t inform the guest that they didn’t ask him to pay for his share of the meal beforehand.

“It’s fine to host and have everyone chip in if that’s what’s discussed at the time of the invitation,” one person wrote. “Being asked to pay after is cheeky.”

“That’s so rude,” another added. “If there’s an expectation that people are going to chip in financially then that needs to be clear ahead of time.”

“Absolutely mental,” a third commented, saying that they spent between £400-£500 hosting a bbq this summer for their family and didn’t request a thing. “I would never expect to pay or ask anyone to pay to come to dinner.”

The original poster later clarified that they had offered before the dinner to bring something, but wasn’t told anything. They also wrote that they suspected that the hosts had decided to split the costs the next day.

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