Paulina Porizkova opens up about ‘shame’ in candid Instagram post: ‘I post thoughts and emotions I’m ashamed of’

Paulina Porizkova has denied being a narcissist after sharing a tearful selfie, with the former supermodel revealing that she has been candid because she wants to be open about her “shame”.

On Thursday, the 56-year-old posted a photo of herself with watery eyes, revealing in the caption that she is struggling to trust and love again after being betrayed.

“Trust after being betrayed seems as far-fetched as being shot into space. Correction. It’s easier to see myself shot into space at this moment,” the former model wrote. “When you’ve been betrayed - promised something, only to have that promise broken without your participation - you were blindsided. You trusted someone you loved, and now all love is suspect.”

A day after sharing the post, Porizkova shared another close-up photo of herself to Instagram, where she thanked fans who had expressed their sympathy for her hardships while revealing that she is being open about her emotions because she is trying to “exorcise [her] shame”.

“Firstly, thank you all so much for the unexpected amount of sympathy. A few of my friends accused me of being a narcissist and posting my emotions on IG so I could get attention and my a** kissed by sycophants,” Porizkova wrote in the caption of the photo. “I had to think about it. Am I here to gather sympathy? And what I discovered is really important to me.”

According to Porizkova, she ultimately concluded that she was not seeking sympathy, but rather wanted to share her insecurities and the things that make her feel ashamed so that she could lose some of those negative feelings.

“No. I’m here because I’m trying to exorcise my shame. I post thoughts and emotions that I’m ashamed of,” she continued, before listing some of the things that she feels shame over, such as that she is “grieving, heartbroken and sad,” that she is “needy” and that she is “ageing”.

In the post, Porizkova revealed that she is also ashamed because she can be a “judgemental b***h” and because she “wasn’t the parent I meant to be” to her two children.

“I’m ashamed that those I loved left me, I’m ashamed of my fear that I’m not worth loving, I’m ashamed to not measure up to expectations and disappoint,” the model wrote, adding that she is also ashamed to cry and of all her vulnerabilities.

Porizkova concluded the post explaining that she wanted to be honest about her insecurities so that she could become more accepting of herself.

“So I share them. Sharing them is making them less shameful and in return, I gain acceptance of who I am. The authentic me. Not the one I would like to sell you,” she continued. “There. I shared with you to lose my shame. You’re welcome to do the same!”

While Porizkova did not specify who she was referring to in her tearful post about betrayal, she has previously spoken about feeling betrayed after learning that her husband Ric Ocasek, who died in September 2019, left her out of his will.

“I would love to be able to be sad and miss him. And not also feel this incredible hurt and betrayal,” Porizkova previously told CBS Sunday Morning host Anthony Mason of her feelings following her husband’s passing. “It made the grieving process really, really tricky.”

The 56-year-old’s recent heartfelt posts also come after she confirmed last month that she and screenwriter Aaron Sorkin had broken up.

In response to Porizkova’s recent post, many of her fans and followers have expressed their support while applauding her honesty and transparency.

“This hits home. So much gratitude for you,” model Tara Lynn wrote, while Andie MacDowell commented: “Ageing is a blessing, you are a blessing. I haven’t met a perfect person yet!! There’s so much pressure to be popular on Instagram, I decided not to play that game so I post sometimes if I have something worth posting and then I do little things on Stories occasionally.

“But I do like being able to say hello to you and send you [heart emoji].”

Actor Wendi McLendon-Covey also shared a message of encouragement, writing: “I adore you, even though we’ve never met. Thanks for putting words to what we’ve all felt at some point.”