Suzuki Jimny review: the next must-have urban fashion accessory

If I were Mercedes Benz, I’d sue. Just look at the front of the new Suzuki Jimny. Can you see what they’ve done there? Let’s say the grille design is very reminiscent of Mercedes’s big SUV, the G-Wagen, a very expensive vehicle that enjoys cult status.

This latest Jimny looks like a “toy” G-Wagen, with hints of Land Rover and, indeed, past rugged little Suzuki off-roaders thrown in as well. The whole short wheelbase, “bob-cat” compact package is cute. Indeed, I might be tempted to call it the cutest new car in the world.

Not the best, you understand. Not by a long way. But for looks, it can’t be faulted.

Thus, I confidently predict the Suzuki Jimny will be the next must-have urban fashion accessory, taking over from the Fiat 500, which in turn inherited the mantle from the Mini, and, if you go back to the mid-1980s, the original Suzuki SJ410, commonly, if erroneously, known as the Suzuki Jeep.

It has serious off-road capability too, though of course this will be rarely used. You can leave the car in (front) two-wheel drive if you like; the high and low ration four-wheel drive gear options are there at the throw of a lever (old school – no electronics here), for the few who are likely to take advantage of its capabilities.

open image in gallery

In my imagination I could see Welsh hill farmers using it to leg it up boulder-strewn hillsides; or hipster types punting it on sandy beaches for surfing expeditions. Mostly, though, it’ll be used for shopping, both for accessories and as a fashion accessory, like having a chihuahua in your handbag.

Apart from looks – which will help it sell well and become quite loved by is owners – it doesn’t honestly have that much going for it. At around £15,000 it isn’t especially cheap, and a SsangYong Tivoli or Dacia Duster would be cheaper and mostly as capable for practical purposes; a used Toyota RAV4 or Land Rover Freelander might be better bets for versatility.

There is no boot to speak of – you have the choice between carrying humans or livestock in the back, basically. On the road, which is where it will be spending its useful life, it is pretty basic.

open image in gallery

The gears whine in quite an antique fashion, the ride is a little unsettled, it doesn’t feel that planted at motorway speeds, and some of the interior is a bit plasticky (though nice looking, again, in that generic retro chunky SUV fashion). It is one of the few new cars that won’t crack 100mph; and it only has five gears.

It is noisy at speed. There’s a small touchscreen with the usual satnav and DAB features, plus an easy to use cruise control system.

At low speeds, around the shopping malls and outlet villages, the lack of sophisticated road manners won’t matter too much to the target audience. The Jimny is hardly luxurious, but still perfectly habitable.

Although the Jimny is compact, and very easy to park (it doesn’t need the parking aids which don’t seem to be available anyway), it is much heavier on fuel than ideal – a result of having to carry around some heavy four-wheel drive mechanical bits for no good reason.

With a small fuel tank that compromises the car’s range. It’s also only available as a petrol model.

Most concerning is the Jimny’s safety rating. It has achieved only three stars in the standard Euro NCAP testing, which the organisation describes as “disappointing”.

open image in gallery

It falls short on adult occupant protection and safety assist systems. You’d be safer in a Ford Fiesta, in other words, despite the Jimny’s rugged appearance.

The Suzuki Jimny, then; pint-sized retro-SUV, off-road capability, and looks that would melt the heart of a Ukip activist. It’s bound to succeed, but I’m not quite sure it deserves to.