Woman sparks debate after revealing how she told her fiancé she hated engagement ring

A woman has shared how she was “honest and transparent” with her fiancé after he proposed with an engagement ring she did not like.

Brittany Finn, who goes by the username @beefinnagain on TikTok, recounted the story in a video uploaded this week, in which she recalled how her now-husband proposed in 2017 with a princess-cut solitaire-diamond ring.

According to Finn, the issue was that she had wanted a different design, as she noted in the video that “everyone I was close to knew that I wanted a halo”.

In the video, which Finn captioned: “How I told my husband I didn’t like my engagement ring,” she began by explaining how she’d gone home after her then-fiancé had proposed, at which point those close to her, but “specifically [her] mom,” had asked how she felt about the ring design.

“She was like: ‘Oh my gosh, how are you feeling?’ And I was like: ‘Oh my gosh, I’m so happy, I’m so excited to be married,’” Finn said, adding that her mother then asked how she felt about the ring. “And I just bawled. And I was like: ‘I hate it, I don’t know what to do, it’s not what I wanted, it doesn’t have a halo around it.’”

According to Finn, her mother suggested that she get an “upgrade” ring for her and her future husband’s five-year anniversary, with the TikToker noting that her mom was “definitely right” and that that should be her plan.

“So I’m just not going to say anything, I’m going to shut my mouth, for now,” Finn recalled thinking, before noting that her father also advised her to do the same thing. “So that’s what I did.”

Finn then went on to recall how she and her fiancé celebrated their engagement the entire weekend, and “everything was fine”. When she went back to school, however, she said that she was inundated with congratulations from friends, who asked if the engagement ring and proposal was “everything you wanted” and whether she “loved [her] ring”.

“And, obviously, every time somebody asked me that I was like: ‘Yeah, oh my gosh, it’s so great, I love it, it’s beautiful.’ And then I proceeded to go to my room, every single time, and cry,” Finn revealed. “And if you’ve ever been engaged, I feel like you know that feeling, everybody asks you: ‘Oh my gosh, congratulations, do you love everything about it?’”

According to Finn, after a week of congratulatory messages from people asking to see her engagement ring, she was “just over it”.

While she noted that she “knew [her] mom was right” and that she shouldn’t ask her fiancé to replace the ring “right then,” she said that she still decided to text her now-husband and ask to talk.

During the conversation, Finn said that she told her fiancé that she wanted to discuss the ring, before expressing how much she loves him and appreciated the effort he put into picking out the ring.

Finn said she then told her partner: “This isn’t something that needs to be addressed right now, but I really just want to be honest with you and transparent, I really don’t like the ring, it’s not what I wanted, and, after a week of people asking me about it, it’s been really hard to fake liking it.”

According to Finn, her now-husband’s response was “so nice,” and told her that they would just return the engagement ring, before assuring her it wasn’t a “big deal”.

“And I was shook. I was like: ‘Really? We can do that?’” Finn recalled, adding that her fiancé told her they would go shopping together and get what she wanted.

Finn concluded the video confirming that the couple was able to return the ring, but that she was “ringless” for two months before they went shopping for a new engagement ring.

“But I ended up getting the ring that I wanted,” she said. “And he was so nice.” In the caption, Finn added: “He took it so well.”

As of Friday, the video has been viewed more than 2.9m times, with viewers in the comments divided by Finn’s story.

According to some TikTok users, she did the right thing by telling her fiancé she was unhappy with the ring he chose.

“If you’re going to wear something on your hand forever, it only matters what YOU think about it,” one person wrote. “I changed my engagement ring too. Happy you did it right away!”

Another said: “This is called a mature relationship and if someone can’t do this then you shouldn’t be getting married.”

“You did the right thing!” someone else added. “It is so much easier to exchange it earlier than later. Saves money in the long run!”

However, others were disapproving of Finn’s attitude about the ring, with many criticising the TikToker for complaining about the style and telling her partner she didn’t like the engagement ring he chose.

“When the ring is more important than the guy… I feel super bad for him,” one person wrote, while another said: “Girl there are bigger problems out there than not liking a ring.”

Someone else claimed that Finn sounded “very entitled,” with another user writing: “Please tell me this is satire.”

“He picked that ring out and thought it was the perfect ring to propose with and you’re crying because you don’t like it? I just can’t wrap my head around that,” one person commented.

In follow-up videos, Finn defended herself from the criticism, with the TikToker noting that she and her husband have been married for four years and are “perfectly fine” and have been “communicating like that since we got engaged”.

Finn then acknowledged the comments she received from viewers telling her that her videos are “rude” or “disrespectful” to her husband, explaining that her husband knows she is making the videos about their engagement.

“He obviously understood that I didn’t like the ring, which is why he was more than willing to replace it, because he understands that that’s a symbol of our marriage and that it is something I have to wear on my finger forever and something that reminds me of him,” she added.

Speaking to Insider about the experience, Finn admitted that she had been nervous telling her husband she didn’t like the ring, but that “his reaction just made it that much more special”.

“I knew I had somebody who loved and cared about me so much,” she said.

Finn’s TikTok comes after a jeweller recently claimed that engagement rings should never be a surprise, and that they should instead be designed or chosen by a couple together.