How do you know when you've found the one?

Happy couples share stories of how they knew they were going to be with their partner for life

Saturday 23 January 2016 12:18 EST
Comments
(Pedro Ribeiro Simoes/Flickr)

Your support helps us to tell the story

From reproductive rights to climate change to Big Tech, The Independent is on the ground when the story is developing. Whether it's investigating the financials of Elon Musk's pro-Trump PAC or producing our latest documentary, 'The A Word', which shines a light on the American women fighting for reproductive rights, we know how important it is to parse out the facts from the messaging.

At such a critical moment in US history, we need reporters on the ground. Your donation allows us to keep sending journalists to speak to both sides of the story.

The Independent is trusted by Americans across the entire political spectrum. And unlike many other quality news outlets, we choose not to lock Americans out of our reporting and analysis with paywalls. We believe quality journalism should be available to everyone, paid for by those who can afford it.

Your support makes all the difference.

A recent study carried found that the average age people in Britain meet "the one" is 27. But how do you really know when you have met them?

In a quest to find out the formula to a lasting relationship, Quora and Reddit users have taken to the social media sites to answer the age old question.

Best-selling author on Amazon and relationship coach, Jordan Gray said: "I have interviewed numerous couples that have been married for anywhere from 20 to 60 years, and they have all had one common denominator… it was easy."

He suggested that your family and friends may be the best people to measure whether you are with the right person.

"Your closest friends and family members aren’t you, but they have a pretty good idea of who you are.

"In fact, recent research suggests that those closest to you actually know you better than you know yourself.”

Self-defined “former dateless nerd” Marcus Geduld said: “I knew it when ...

"1) I realized she was my best friend, and…

"2) I knew I'd want to stay with her even if she got into a horrible, disfiguring accident and was crippled for life. I simply couldn't imagine life without her.”

Reddit user, Brian1321 said: “When I took stock of my life and realized her not being a part of it made it a whole lot less appealing. We complement each other’s personality, we don't blindly agree with the other one, and we make each other want to be the best versions of ourselves. If that's not a reason to marry someone then I don't know what is.”

However, not everyone was convinced by the idea that everyone has a soul mate:

“A soul mate, put most simply, is a person who brings out the best in you, who makes you the best possible version of yourself, and vice versa. Forget all the stuff you read in trashy romance novels or see in romantic comedies about choruses of angels singing or butterflies in your tummy—that's merely chemical, a reaction to immune system molecules called major histocompatibility complexes... and it can lead you wrong.” Said Franklin Veaux, co-author of More Than Two: A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory.

Many Reddit users shared the stories of how they knew they were with the person they were going to marry.

“I was 30 and a friend introduced me to my future wife. We met at a bar, neutral ground, and started dating after that," Reddit user Jfrizzera said. "13 years later we've got two children, a dog, and a house. Before I met her, I had a long talk with my father about how I was sure I'd never get married because it wasn't for me.”

FireJellyPenguin siad: “I was 20 on my first date with my husband. We'd been friends for about 3 years prior to this and it sort of changed after we jokingly made a Friends-style 'if we're not married by 30, we'll marry each other!' sort of deal. I guess that made us think about what being married to each other would be like, and it was pretty good. We've been married five years now, and we're still like a pair of love-struck teenagers!”

Another Reddit user, Joker961, said: “I was 48. I met wife online when she was one of the few real people to respond to my profile on the Cupid.com dating site. We chatted online for a bit. We hit it off so well that we wanted to meet in person. After seeing her, I knew there would never be another woman for me. We got married about a year later. Still together and still happy. I was only on that website because my best friend met his wife there too. (Also still married and happy.)”

Join our commenting forum

Join thought-provoking conversations, follow other Independent readers and see their replies

Comments

Thank you for registering

Please refresh the page or navigate to another page on the site to be automatically logged inPlease refresh your browser to be logged in