BBC launches sex positive podcast to inspire British Asian women to own their sexuality

'Women have been silenced for so long about sex'

Olivia Petter
Wednesday 24 July 2019 11:06 EDT
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(BBC)

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The BBC is launching a new podcast aimed at opening up conversations surrounding sex among British Asian women.

On Thursday, the broadcasting service will debut “Brown Girls Do It Too” hosted by Poppy Jay, Roya Eslami and Rubina Pabani, all of whom are committed to inspiring young women to talk openly about sex without feeling ashamed or restricted by cultural expectations.

The podcast takes a no holds barred approach to its subject matter, with episodes covering topics such as masturbation, virginity and orgasms.

The women themselves are from a diverse mix of backgrounds: Jay’s family is British-Bangladeshi, Pabani’s parents are from East Africa and Eslami’s mother and father are both Iranian.

By launching the podcast, the three women hope they will tackle some of the taboos about female sexuality in their respective cultures.

“A lot of British Asians in this country come from more traditional patriarchal backgrounds and being a woman means there are certain roles we must play – sultry sex goddess is not one of them,” Pabani tells The Independent.

But popular culture has a part to play too, the podcaster continues. “We’re not seen on screen in the UK unless we’re doctors in a soap or a scientist in Panorama, so it’s hugely important to highlight we are sexual beings too, in control of our bodies and with urges just like everybody else.

“Basically, we like sex – and not just to make babies, for pure pleasure – and that should not be a radical thing to say.”

Eslami explains how, “as a brown woman who was born and raised in Britain”, people are often shocked to find how open she is to discuss sex in detail.

“I’m tired of society looking at us as sexless,” the co-host continues. “The last brown girl I saw on TV had bombs strapped to her.”

Eslami, Pabani and Jay.
Eslami, Pabani and Jay. (BBC)

The consequences of this, Jay explains, are that when you do become sexually active, it can lead to a constant feeling that you are doing something inherently wrong or disappointing your parents.

“It’s easy to get why so many women discuss sex, shame and guilt in the same sentence,” she says.

“Women have been silenced for so long about sex, it’s used as form of power and control. Effectively, it is a bad thing and we pretend it doesn’t exist, when in fact sex should be taught as this totally normal and natural experience that you are meant to enjoy.”

The trio hope that launching “Brown Girls Do It Too” will tap away at some of these harmful preconceptions and encourage young women of all ethnic backgrounds to have honest and empowering conversations about sex.

“We talk about everything we can,” says Eslami. “Vulva sizes, notches on the bed posts, pubic hair, lack of orgasms, multiple orgasms. We don’t judge each other.”

A crucial component of the hosts’ conversations is that they don’t present themselves as infallible experts on any topic. “None of us have lived the perfect sex life,” says Eslami.

“We trawl through our pleasures and our mistakes and with that, everything we’ve learned about sex. I think anyone who has ever had a sexual thought will be able to relate; we get deep and dirty, but we keep it real and honest. I really hope people connect with it.”

You can listen to the first episode of “Brown Girls Do It Too” on BBC Sounds from Thursday 25 July.

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