Transgender father of two who had first child as a woman explains difference between pregnancies
'Nothing about my first pregnancy felt hopeful or within my control'
Your support helps us to tell the story
From reproductive rights to climate change to Big Tech, The Independent is on the ground when the story is developing. Whether it's investigating the financials of Elon Musk's pro-Trump PAC or producing our latest documentary, 'The A Word', which shines a light on the American women fighting for reproductive rights, we know how important it is to parse out the facts from the messaging.
At such a critical moment in US history, we need reporters on the ground. Your donation allows us to keep sending journalists to speak to both sides of the story.
The Independent is trusted by Americans across the entire political spectrum. And unlike many other quality news outlets, we choose not to lock Americans out of our reporting and analysis with paywalls. We believe quality journalism should be available to everyone, paid for by those who can afford it.
Your support makes all the difference.A transgender man who recently gave birth to his second child after having his first baby while presenting as a woman five years earlier has spoken out about the differences between his pregnancies.
Speaking to the Victoria Derbyshire Show, Kaci Sullivan from Missouri explained why his second pregnancy was so much more enjoyable than his first.
“They were very different experiences, for sure,” he said. “Nothing about my first pregnancy felt hopeful or within my control. My body didn’t look anything like I wanted it to.
“I was still wrestling with the fact that that was my reality. I hadn’t told anybody, I didn’t know if I ever would. I was so depressed, I didn’t know if I’d be able to bond with the baby once I had them.
“I was so terrified: What’s my life going to look like? What’s this baby’s life going to look like?
“The pregnancy itself was sort of an ‘oopsie’ pregnancy; I wasn’t trying for it. I didn’t mean it to happen.
“The way I thought about myself and perceived myself was so different. I’ve changed a lot in the last five-and-a-half years.”
30-year-old Sullivan explained how he’d hoped becoming pregnant the first time would make him feel more connected to womanhood, but it didn’t.
But during his second pregnancy, as a man, there was none of the anxiousness he’d felt the first time.
“I wasn’t trying to turn it into something it could never be. This time I was trying to make it work for my own expectations, at least a lot more things were in my control. It was an experience I was emotionally prepared for this time,” he said.
Sullivan is believed to be the first person in the world to give birth living as both a woman and a man.
In giving birth to his new baby, Phoenix - a healthy child weighing 8lbs 9oz - Sullivan underwent a C-section after seven days in labour.
Phoenix was conceived with Sullivan’s partner Steven, 27, after Sullivan took a break from male hormones.
The birth comes four years after the business student started his transition from female to male.
Join our commenting forum
Join thought-provoking conversations, follow other Independent readers and see their replies
Comments