Secret Service: How First Date's Fred got his smile

I learned my first lesson in hospitality – one that I have never forgotten – when I was perhaps five years old.

Dad – who was a hospital nurse – was shaving. ‘’Dad, why do you always shave before you go to work?’’ I asked. ‘’Fred, I need to shave,’’ he said, ‘’because I need to look the part. If I don’t, the patients are not going to trust me.’’ He continued with the razor, gliding it carefully around his exquisitely clipped moustache. ‘’I need to make sure that they know that I’m the man who’s going to look after them.’’

Finding yourself in the hospital’s intensive care unit was a traumatic experience for many local people, who rarely left the surrounding villages: hooked up to monitors, wires and tubes. One day an old man was brought to hospital; he lay in bed with the sheets up to his eyes. My father walked into the room and said: ‘’How are you granddad?’’ From the patient’s perspective, here was a man who looked good – handsome, immaculately dressed and, of course, he was clean shaven, except for his meticulous moustache.

The patient’s eyes lit up. His fear evaporated and a connection had been made. Through his appearance and his manner, my father put this anxious man at ease. He showed hospitality.

The ancient Romans used the word hospitalis. From this Latin origin, we have the word hospital, hospitable and host. What I do in a restaurant is not about service, but about hospitality. It is about the bond that can be created in an instant between strangers – accomplished when you make them feel special.

But how did my father do that? Simple! He smiled first. This was the second lesson in hospitality that I observed in a hospital rather than a restaurant. I tell all my staff on reception: ‘’There is only one thing that you must get right, first and foremost. When people come in to the restaurant, you must see, smile and say hello before they do the same to you.’’ If you cannot do that then you have failed.

My father saw his patients as guests. So from an early age I understood the basis of customer service and that leadership is about what you do, not what you say.

Already, we’ve learned that that the waiter does not require much in order to do the job well. He must appear clean and be impeccable at all times. Well-polished shoes and a decent memory are essential. As the waiter, you have to be focused and be ready for action – have your wits about you. You must maintain high standards and have zero tolerance for a laissez-faire attitude.

Then there is the smile. The smile is an integral part of the uniform. No one would think or dare to come to work without their shirt or trousers, so don’t you dare come to work for me without your smile. No matter what is happening in your life, in service you must keep on smiling and you need to want to make people happy. You do not need to tell me, your boss, that you are good. If you are, I will see it. Just do your job: be dedicated, hospitable and smile.

So, if it is that simple, how do people stand out? Well, I think that service is like a car production line but with one crucial difference. With both, you know exactly what you need to do. In a factory, at one end you have the raw materials and, as the parts come down the conveyor belt, the production line puts them together to make the car. No matter where the factory is in the world, you still end up with each car being identical.

Service is similar. You know what you need to do: look after your guests. In a way, the customer journey in a restaurant is like the conveyor belt of a factory. But here is the crucial difference. In the factory, it is a mechanical, robotic process. This is the ‘‘what’’. In service, you also have the ‘’how’’ you achieve it. This is the hardest part to get right because it is about perception; the customer’s perception.

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The best way to do this is to establish distinct touchpoints in every customer journey. Every single touchpoint is there for a specific purpose and must be able to create trust. In religion trust is the basis of love. In business trust is the basis of loyalty. And loyalty cannot exist without reliability and consistency, hence why it is so vital to have a well-defined customer journey.

For example, meeting and greeting customers at reception is both the most basic and the mother of all standards. The basic is just what you do, because every restaurant is supposed to do it. The key to a great restaurant is how you do it. For me, it is all about the three Ss: see, smile and say hello. This is the first of the touchpoints in any restaurant I run. It is non-negotiable, and if you don’t get it, then you are out.

Edited from Secret Service: Lifting the lid on the restaurant world by Fred Sirieix (Quadrille, £16.99). Photography: Chris Terry