First things first

Choosing a nanny for a first baby can be one of the most harrowing experiences a new mother faces. Already nervous at the thought of going back to work and leaving your baby at home, the prospect of what could happen when you walk out of the door and leave your child with what is in effect a stranger is terrifying. Recently, there has been a spate of stories about young children injured or even killed by nannies or child- minders, and there is now talk of setting up a national nanny register to try to cut down on the risks.

As a new mother it is very difficult to be sure that you have picked the right nanny for your child. Does she have enough experience? Will she stimulate your child? Above all, do you trust her to care for your child just as you would? Most parents go into the game of choosing a nanny with little or no information, and succeed - or fail - through trial and error. But now a new nanny agency has been set up, specifically for first- time mothers.

Tracey Fox has been a nanny for over 10 years, and has now established the agency First Nannies in south London, although she can place nannies nationwide. "At the moment most nanny agencies won't let you register until you have actually had your baby - usually around four to six weeks before you're intending to go back to work. For a lot of mothers, that is simply too late. If they know they have to go back to work, they spend the latter part of their pregnancy worrying about how they are going to get the best care for their child," she says.

Before setting up the agency, Tracey carried out a survey of over a hundred pregnant women at St George's Hospital in London. "Eighty-two per cent said they wanted to get a nanny sorted out at six months into their pregnancy, so that the worry was taken care of," she says.

The number of women returning to work after giving birth has increased from half to two thirds since 1988, according to new research published this week, and 15 per cent of new mothers are taking less than their 14 weeks statutory maternity leave.

No surprise then that the number of women employing full-time nannies has risen dramatically. The latest figures show that of the 82 per cent of women who return to work after pregnancy and who have higher than A- level qualifications, 60 per cent decide to take on a nanny rather than use child-minders or private day care at a nursery. But there are a huge number of pitfalls. "The worst part is that first morning when you walk out of the door," says Tracey. "I understand it is very hard not to lay a guilt trip on the nanny, because she's staying behind. But if you have already built up a relationship with a nanny because you've employed her much earlier perhaps to work with you at home first, than that terrible first day is much easier. If you are confident about your nanny, then returning to work should be pleasurable," says Tracey.

At the agency Tracey is looking for nannies who are best-skilled at looking after new babies, as well as older siblings. "I'm not just employing nannies who are qualified, because some of the best nannies are the ones with experience rather than qualifications. Parents also want different types of people - some want a more mature person, others want a young lively girl who will really stimulate their child. Ideally for a baby you do want someone who is very calm and capable, and who does have experience."

The signing-on fee with the agency for a full-time nanny is pounds 450, a full- time nanny share pounds 350 and pounds 90 for part-time care. Daily nannies now expect to earn between pounds 35 and pounds 50 per day, according to experience. Live-in nannies would expect from pounds 40 per week upwards.

Parents are first sent a full registration pack, which clearly sets out the rules and guidelines. Tracey encourages parents to be extremely honest about what they want, because not being so initially leads to problems later. She says, "One of the main reasons why nannies leave is time. Parents say they work certain hours, but will then `unexpectedly' have to work until seven or eight at night. If you tell the nanny at the beginning that some nights she will have to work late and you will pay her accordingly, then resentment doesn't occur."

References are thoroughly checked by Tracey before she takes nannies on. She doesn't provide police checks, but encourages parents to do so if they wish. She also advises parents to talk to previous employers, to get a true picture of what their potential nanny is like. "I also advise parents to look carefully at their nannies' CVs. If there are long, unexplained gaps in their career, I would be very suspicious. If a nanny has left under a cloud from a previous job, make sure you get the employer's side of the story as well."

In choosing a nanny from the final shortlist, she says gut instinct is important. "You know if you can get on with someone, and whether you can trust them with your child. We had one couple who were adamant that they wanted an older, experienced person for their first baby. After interviewing lots of women, they just couldn't find who they wanted, because they said they had `no life about them'. They ended up with a 20-year-old girl with a punk haircut and, months on, they're thrilled with her."

It is vitally important to set out what you expect by way of additional duties in your contract with your first nanny. A big cause of resentment is over casual comments such as, "If you're not too busy could you iron my husband's shirts?" Or, "Do you think you could just run a hoover over the house and pick up the dry cleaning?" That's fine if you have specified general housework duties as part of the initial contract - inconsiderate if you haven't. Most nannies will expect to wash and iron the children's clothes, and keep areas like the kitchen clean and tidy after meals.

"You must also check about transport, and whether they can drive," says Tracey. "One girl said confidently to me she had her own transport, and then roared up on a motorbike. I asked where the baby would go, and she said she could buy a sidecar. Imagine a mother's face if that was suggested."

Watching how your children react to the nanny is also a very good guideline. If they immediately want to climb on her knee, then that is a very good sign. Also, you can tell from the general health and well-being of your baby if she and the nanny are getting on fine. I had one nanny I was a bit worried about, so I sneaked home early one day. Sure enough, I found her watching Neighbours while my daughter yelled upstairs.

But a good nanny, if you can afford one, is often the best option for a baby. They're getting one-to-one, consistent care, with someone they will love and trust.

It's also likely that you will form a very strong bond with your nanny, because you are placing so much love and trust in her. When my last nanny left, we were both in tears. She still rings and sends letters to the children, and they miss her very much. I'm sure that at one stage my youngest daughter regarded us as pretty much interchangeable. At the time I resented that a little - inevitable when she was spending so much time with them. I just made sure I didn't lay a guilt trip on her n

`First Nannies' can be contacted on 0181-488 5592.