Jodie Kidd reveals she suffered ‘huge’ panic attack on catwalk that led her to quit modelling
'Everyone was staring at me and I just wanted to flee,' former model recalls
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Your support makes all the difference.Jodie Kidd has revealed how a “huge” panic attack led her to quit modelling, aged 19.
The polo player and pub owner started working as a model when she was 15 years old after she was scouted on a beach in Barbados.
But despite a fledgling career that saw her walking the runway for Fendi and fronting numerous Vogue covers, Kidd chose to walk away due to crippling anxiety.
“I used to think I was having a heart attack,” the 41-year-old told The Daily Mail.
“My heart would race, I’d go all clammy and feel faint.”
Kidd went on to recall her final runway appearance as a teenage model.
“The last time I walked the catwalk in my teens, I suffered a huge panic attack halfway down. Everyone was staring at me and I just wanted to flee. I got off and vowed never to return.”
While Kidd did not name which designer she was walking for at the time, she explained that the incident “freaked [her] out”, adding: “I knew I had to press reset”.
A lot of her anxiety came from criticisms over her weight, she explained.
“This was in the mid-1990s when people didn’t understand anxiety and panic attacks in the way they do now. I now know that when you feel anxious, your body is flooded with this ‘fight or flight’ rush. I hadn’t a clue back then. I was so strung out I couldn’t sleep and I couldn’t eat, which meant I got even thinner.
“And then the stories about my weight increased and everyone said I was anorexic. It was a horrible cycle to be trapped in.”
Following the on-catwalk panic attack, Kidd moved back to her hometown in Sussex where she said she did little else other than riding horses, eating and sleeping.
But in February, she returned to the catwalk after 10 years for the VIN + OMI show as part of London Fashion Week.
Despite fronting fashion campaigns since, including her latest for Boden, Kidd remains mostly out of the limelight by living in West Sussex where she works at the landlady of her village gastropub, the Half Moon in Kirdford.
“The Half Moon has been my therapy,” Kidd said of the role. “It’s changed my whole demeanour.”
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