FANDANGO

Zoe Brown
Saturday 03 January 1998 19:02 EST
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Many people get a wee bit down after Christmas, having spent too much money etc, especially women - as they are much more generous than men. Well, I have just the thing to cheer you up. Pictured left are these beautiful men in underpants, and rather than run just one pic I thought I should run four. What better way to start the year? Apparently, HOM underpants, socks and pyjamas are what most men wanted for Christmas. Too bad, you'll just have to wait until next year. Meanwhile, get your other half to pose for you, like these men. You'll be sure to have some fun.

So, Christmas is over - everybody has returned to work penniless and the alcohol recovery period has set in with the blood finally returning to your veins. Your party dress now hangs in the wardrobe, hopefully you won't be seen dead in it until next year. If your name is Zoe Brown, it ain't that simple. You see, my feet are firmly in my stilettoes and my dress is still on my back - ready for the next soiree. Yes, in the line of duty, I bring you all (although there's not that much of it) exciting news.

The Wings of the Dove premiered at London's Plaza cinema just before Christmas - a beautiful love story with the hugely talented Helena Bonham Carter and sex-on- legs Linus Roache (son of William Roache, aka Ken Barlow in Coronation Street - much better looking of course). Lucky girl even ended up in the buff with him, which I'm sure was rather embarrassing for the pair of them, even though it was shot stupendously, still I'm no film critic, so I shall move on to the bash which was thrown afterwards to celebrate its impending success no doubt (do I sound like Barry Norman?). Hosted by Buena Vista and Italian design house Etro, who make exquisite clothes, as seen on our very own Real Life pages just a few Sundays ago. Attended by Mick Jagger, who I must admit does absolutely nothing for me (which I'm sure would worry the hell out of him) and Tamara "Mummy my ponytail is too tight" Beckwith, not forgetting Helena and Linus, who I tried to shimmy up against all night, which he was having none of. Shame, still we did eat, drink and be merry.

Actor Ralph (pronounced ray-ff) Fiennes was spotted at an exclusive members-only club t'other day. Unfortunately, it being Christmas and all, the club had decided to let a party of young, attractive girls in wearing fancy dress, who recognised him, accosted the charming actor, asked for his autograph and insisted on making the most of the photo opportunity - while calling him Ralph, much to his distaste. Now girls, you must learn to pronounce his name correctly.

A word of advice. If you've been to a few parties over Christmas and they haven't been much of a success because you find it hard to mingle with people, don't worry, next time you're asked to a party, ask if you can bring your parents along. They are the new accessory - last year it was babies, this year it's parents, yah. Parents have no shame, they feel no embarrassment, they will talk to anybody, thus leaving many a chitty-chatty opportunity open to you. Apparently, it works every time.

I see that the ever-so-stylish shop Voyage will be opening a new store on the Fulham Road soon. Unfortunately, due to their rather strict door policy you will be refused entry unless you are: a) famous, b) impeccably dressed, or c) look like you have oodles of cash! Visit if you dare.

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