I’ve ordered the Christmas turkey for eight – there will be plenty of leftovers if nobody is around to eat it

I am not sure what tier we will be in after 2 December but I can’t face another dollop of doom from Professor Chris Whitty, the man who has demonised hugging granny, and reckons that anyone living in tier 1 can only expect further restrictions after the review on 16 December.

As MP Esther McVey opined, it’s like saying the best way to reduce road deaths is by not driving. Whitty might think he’s a realist, but his pronouncements are not playing well in the real world where we’re tired and confused.

Whitty-generated fear now means most of my single friends are too scared to get in their cars and come to stay at Christmas, even though I have promised separate bathing and copious sanitising.

I remain optimistic some might change their mind – so the official turkey has been ordered, for collection on Christmas Eve. It weighs 4-5 kilos – the smallest free-range bird available at good local butchers – which should feed at least 8.

If no one turns up, I will empty the freezer ready to receive turkey curry, turkey pilaf, turkey soup and turkey stew which should last for the rest of 2021. The process of freezer rationalisation has already started – this weekend, we’re eating the goose left over from last Christmas along with the damsons from 2018.