Coronavirus has put our ability to understand each other under strain

This week saw the back to school rush in full flow as if Covid-19 never happened, well at least to some extent.

Admittedly the last school year did have a visible lack of one-way systems, staggered start times from form to form and mask-wearing parents, but day one of the new term definitely felt as chaotic, if not more chaotic, than usual.

Parents getting to grips with the different entry and exit gates for different Key Stage groups, no school bags or possessions to be brought in where possible, sending kids in wearing PE kit on PE days (at least at our school at any rate) and other such changes.

One notable divider between the parents and people in general is mask wearing. The school letter definitely stated all parents and carers should wear masks at drop off and pick up, but this was certainly not the reality. Many did, some were inbetweeners, (we’ll come to them later) and then there were those that just hadn’t bothered.

So what is the new etiquette? Berate those that don’t? Give them a wide berth when they bound over to say hi? Or apologetically pull yours off in embarrassment ("How square of me wearing this silly old thing. I honestly don’t think you have it. I was just wearing it in case I encountered someone who I thought might be afflicted. Don’t judge me.") The whole thing brings a brand new set of problems and it’s not just limited to mask wearing.

This week the independent think tank Demos published a UK-wide survey which suggests the solidarity of the early weeks of the coronavirus pandemic has now given way to distrust. I personally would go one further, and say the solidarity of lockdown has now given way to mistrust.

The way I see it is when we’re all housebound and “in it together” we unite, but once it’s each for themselves again and we regain a bit of independence we revert to old ways. In the early days of the virus I remember that mistrust. Fighting for loo rolls in supermarkets, judgemental looks for wearing a mask before it was de rigueur (there were certainly no insta-friendly leopard print designs back then) and conversely the disdain and repulsion us mask wearers would direct at those maskless and coughing in the street.

I also remember the relief when nearing someone like-minded only for both parties to give each other a wide berth with suspicion giving way to a knowing look in our eyes and a smile beneath our masks. Phew, another Covid cautionist. Solidarity. In the very early days, I remember feeling embarrassment about being a believer; before lockdown you were treated like a lunatic. A bit like in an apocalyptic film, the one nut job trying to warn the others of impending doom.

The poll of 10,000 people has found that nearly three-fifths of mask wearers have severely negative attitudes towards their non-mask wearing peers. In fact, lockdown and Covid-19 rule adherence and lack of it in the UK is now causing deeper divisions than between Brexit supporters and Remainers.

Whereas a third of Remainers feel animosity towards Leavers, two-thirds of lockdown abiders feel animosity towards Dominic Cummings. It would seem coronavirus is the new Brexit. The same is consistent with other groups such as stockpilers vs those that didn’t, NHS hand clappers vs those that didn’t and lockdown supporters vs those opposing it. All the former groups had a larger percentage of people feeling the latter consisted of bad people compared to the same stat for Remainers and Leavers.

The problem as Demos points out is that people’s experience of Covid-19 has differed so wildly. Some have gone through the most awful times while others have been unscathed. So our ability to understand each other has been put under huge strain. As Demos chief executive Polly MacKenzie points out: “Social trust is really important for economic growth ... being divided will impact our recovery.”

The people I really don’t understand are the inbetweeners, the ones half wearing the mask. EXPOSED NOSE DOESN’T COUNT! WE BREATHE THROUGH OUR NOSES TOO! Some go further and act as though it’s just a beard cover or new casual fashion statement hanging off one ear. I’m just waiting for the likes of Nike, DKNY and Prada to bring out designer masks, then I’m gonna get REALLY judgemental.