Love Island 2021 review: Lucinda mourned the loss of her hunk as if he were dead

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The first line of The Great Gatsby reads: “In my younger and more vulnerable years my father gave me some advice that I’ve been turning over in my mind ever since. Whenever you feel like criticising anyone, he told me, just remember that all the people in this world haven’t had the advantages that you’ve had.” I couldn’t help but wonder whether this same sentiment was echoing through our couples’ minds, as they watched Brad and Lucinda’s fledgling romance crumble under the cruel thumb of the public vote.

And cruel it was! After returning, giddy and in-love following their first date, the state-enforced split of Brad and Lucinda sent shockwaves through the villa. It was time for everyone to watch in horror as Lucinda and Brad were forced to discuss their impending break-up, deciding which of the two would leave. As the nation watched with bated breath, knuckles white from the tension of it all, something magical happened. Animorphing from Small Town Hunk to Kind, Gentle, Disney Prince of Our Heart, Brad tenderly held Lucinda in his huge, tanned arms, sacrificing himself so that she might remain.

It felt more like a Taylor Swift fantasy than a Love Island dumping, as Brad, dressed in a simple plaid shirt, wept out any remnants of toxic masculinity onto Lucinda’s shoulder. This is why Brad and Lucinda are the Jay Gatsby and Daisy Buchanan of Love Island. Brad, a boy from humble beginnings done good, and Lucinda, a girl whose beauty is so powerful, not even “Great Male Ambition” can fight against it. Bidding goodbye to his beloved boys, Brad shared one final kiss with Lucinda before slipping into the great beyond, boat against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past…

With Brad gone, it was up to our islanders to pick up the pieces, Sharon and Faye in particular finding the whole situation too difficult to stomach. Though I would like to make clear that Sharon and Faye’s emotions are #Valid, it doesn’t make them #NotTotalBullshit, both the girls using Lucinda’s decision to stay as evidence of manipulation and game playing. But girls, it’s Love Island? No one is morally obligated to leave a once in a lifetime opportunity for fame and stardom after having snogged a boy for a week.

Whether or not Lucinda is able to recover from this setback is another story. Despite Brad only being one Heathrow ticket away, that didn’t stop Lucinda mourning the loss of her hunk as if he were dead. I only hope that were I to suddenly shuffle off this mortal coil, the memory of my existence would also prompt my loved ones to cry into their bowl of Special K. With raspberries in it.

Other morality issues were at play after last night’s explosive dumping. Reckoning with his and Chloe’s bottom-three placement, Toby began to spiral into an existential panic, ruminating into an abyss of overthinking and despair. If this wasn’t so closely mirrored in the conversations I have with my therapist, I would have been less sympathetic. But we chronic catastrophists have to stick together. For Chloe, this proved to be the first test in their relationship, and also, an opportunity for her to reveal her alter ego. As she called Toby her fake, her voice flitting between Oxford Rah and Catherine Tate’s Lauren Cooper, I felt something new stir within me. Could it possibly be? No... Surely not. Suddenly, I was Team Chloe.

In a show manufactured and designed to destroy the confidence of every couple that walks through its doors, it’s surely amateur hour to be rattled by the first public vote. If Toby can’t believe in the validity of his relationship, why should we?

With new girl AJ ready to step on necks in a bid to stay on the island, and newly single Lucinda left to figure out her next steps, who knows what will happen next?