Penis Ring Wars: London Fire Brigade shoehorns Star Wars into safety video about penis rings

The iconic opening crawl starts with the title 'PENIS RING WARS'

Charlie Atkin
Thursday 24 December 2015 07:06 EST
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London Fire Brigade attempt Star Wars parody

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Every brand under the sun has tried to jump on the Star Wars bandwagon, but the prize for the most tenuous connection has perhaps been claimed.

London Fire Brigade have released a bizarre video that uses the iconic opening crawl made famous by the Star Wars franchise. Only this one carries the title 'Penis Ring Wars'.

The video warns against the use of penis rings after earlier this month, a man was revealed to have had surgery in order to dislodge two metal rings stuck to his penis.

The message reads: “The force awakens in some Londoners which has resulted in people being stuck or trapped in objects like handcuffs or rings.

“The Firefighter Alliance is campaigning to reduce some of the time-wasting calls in a bid to drive down incidents across the galaxy.

“One time firefighters came to the rescue of a man forced to undergo surgery to remove two metal rings that had been stuck on his penis for three days.

“Don't use the force Luke, Anakin or Yoda.

“If it doesn't fit, don't force it...

“(And keep the keys handy)”

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