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Radiohead new album A Moon Shaped Pool reviewed by an 8-year-old

"Reminds me of Kung Fu Panda"

Clarisse Loughrey
Monday 09 May 2016 06:17 EDT
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Radiohead's highly-anticipated album A Moon Shaped Pool finally dropped, after much smoke and mirrors, on 8 May; allowing us plenty of time for every possible take on the album to have already been furiously written by every corner of the internet.

In fact, we've probably already gone through the entire round of, "it's a masterpiece - it's overrated - no, wait, it's a masterpiece", as the same tiresome, cyclical shifts of cultural conversation inevitably come into play.

What we really need is the opinion of someone entirely untouched by the airs and shifts of musical critique - say, an 8-year-old. Yes, that would actually be the most perfect and honest review of A Moon Shaped Pool you could ever hope for, which is why we must be quite thankful for Twitter user Beth Gordon posting her own 8-year-old's track-by-track review of the album.


Here's the verdict in full, with corresponding track titles:

Track 1: "Burn the Witch"
Verdict: "Festival like"

Track 2: "Daydreaming"
Verdict: "A long song kind of boring"

Track 3: Decks Dark
Verdict: "A good song relaxing"

Track 4: Desert Island Disk
Verdict: "My favourite song so far"

Track 5: Ful Stop
Verdict: "Reminds me of boxing"

Track 6: Glass Eyes
Verdict: "A nice peaceful song"

Track 7: Identikit
Verdict: "Don't really like it hard to hear what he says"

Track 8: The Numbers
Verdict: "Reminds me of Kung Fu Panda"

Track 9: Present Tense
Verdict: "Nice music"

Track 10: Tinker Tailor Solider Sailor Rich Man Poor Man Beggar Man Thief
Verdict: "My favourite song in the album"

Track 11: True Love Waits
Verdict: "Could make people cry"

The album is currently available to stream on almost every service except Spotify, perhaps due to frontman Thom Yorke's criticism of it as the, "last desperate fart of a dying corpse."

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