Gods of Egypt review: Not worth the papyrus it is written on

Alex Proyas, 127 mins, starring: Nikolaj Coster-Waldau, Brenton Thwaites, Gerard Butler, Geoffrey Rush, Elodie Young

This is an exercise in very grand kitsch, a CGI-driven sword and sandal epic in which the dialogue in tin-eared, the performances creak and even the special effects are cheesy in the extreme.

It is enjoyable enough as an old fashioned matinee-style romp but the crudity is still startling. A generation ago, there might at least have been the consolation of some Ray Harryhausen stop-motion monsters rather than the digitally created giant worms that crawl across the sand here.

Gerard Butler, an actor who relishes wearing togas, is cast as the big, hairy villain, Set, a muscular Egyptian God who just happens to have a broad Scottish accent.

Angry at being left to fester in the desert, Set murders his brother Osiris (Bryan Brown, who speaks in an Aussie accent) and plucks out the bionic eyes from his nephew Horus (Coster-Waldau) before proclaiming himself the one true king. The main human character is Bek (Thwaites), an artful dodger-like thief madly in love with servant girl Zaya (Courtney Eaton.)

The film reaches its absolute nadir in the scenes involving first Horus and then Set venturing into outer space to meet the head God, Ra (Geoffrey Rush dressed in white and looking like an inmate in an asylum for the criminally insane.) Director Proyas throws in plenty of fights and chases. Locations range from the underworld to mountain tops, from deserted places to cascading waterfalls. At one stage, the main characters do their best to solve the riddle of the Sphinx.

The film turns into a glorified buddy movie. Bek is helping Horus on condition that the God brings his beloved back to life. Late on, we hear a character mutter that something is “not worth the papyrus it is written on.” That goes for the film itself, although there is no questioning its camp appeal.