Barometer
Your support helps us to tell the story
From reproductive rights to climate change to Big Tech, The Independent is on the ground when the story is developing. Whether it's investigating the financials of Elon Musk's pro-Trump PAC or producing our latest documentary, 'The A Word', which shines a light on the American women fighting for reproductive rights, we know how important it is to parse out the facts from the messaging.
At such a critical moment in US history, we need reporters on the ground. Your donation allows us to keep sending journalists to speak to both sides of the story.
The Independent is trusted by Americans across the entire political spectrum. And unlike many other quality news outlets, we choose not to lock Americans out of our reporting and analysis with paywalls. We believe quality journalism should be available to everyone, paid for by those who can afford it.
Your support makes all the difference.Cuddle of the Week
FORGET RIO. If you want to meet a big hermaphrodite couple cuddling, then make sure you get yourself down to the Millennium Dome. The Body Zone will feature this 90ft pair. You'll enter by the elbow of the more male of the two (thus proving that the organisers do know their arse from their elbow) and leave by the foot. You'll hear a heart pounding and a stomach gurgling (after all, one of the sponsors is McDonald's). You'll also have a brain scan. If you've got one, you're not allowed in. And nothing about what Monty Python fans will know as "the naughty bits"? Nothing so vulgar.
Split of the Week
NAUGHTY BITS are no problem for our 50,000 sun-loving naturists. But they are facing the biggest split in their 75 year history. The "moderates" are traditional, a little shy, and organised by the Central Council of British Naturism. But the militant tendency - the out-and-out nudists - have embraced a radical agenda. They want to bare all on public beaches. Their ringleader is Mark Nisbet, who runs Starkers magazine from a shed in Bournemouth and wants rights: "Starkers is an agitational device to stick a spanner in the works." Just so long as he doesn't miss.
Primates of the Week
THE PG TIPS chimps. The stars still drink tea and make impolite conversation, in retirement at Twycross Zoo. Now they have television. Viewing is serene, but they become agitated by crime shows with violence. And they are sent to bed when Planet of the Apes comes on. Don't want them getting ideas, do we?
Threat of the Week
THE TELLYTUBBIES are - yes, let's say it - unashamedly nudist and hermaphrodite characters. But there are rumours that four new characters called Tweenies are being groomed by the BBC to take over. Jake, Fizz, Milo and Bella are going to resemble real children: 260 episodes commissioned. Treachery.
Equation of the Week
THE OPTIMAL period (L) for dunking a biscuit in your tea
L = (g x D x t)/(4 x h)
Where g = surface tension; h = viscosity; D is a diameter of the biccie holes and t is how long it takes the tea to run into the biscuit.
Image of the Week
AS FAR from naked as you can get, HM Queen in Parliament, reading out Blairite soundbites about modernisation. Wonder if she's ever considered "acting natural"?
Join our commenting forum
Join thought-provoking conversations, follow other Independent readers and see their replies
Comments