20 pledges for 2020: Don't blame the climate crisis on parents having children

Ahh, nothing like some words of encouragement to help you achieve a new year’s resolution, is there? Some moral support, if you will; some assurance that, yes, you can do this, you absolute hero.

So, I was naturally delighted with the online response to my first 2020 pledge blog. In it, I’d outlined plans to become a more sustainable parent in a bid to do my bit for the environment.

“Best way to help the planet,” noted one cheerful commenter almost immediately upon publication, “is to have no children.”

“By producing another human being,” came another, “you are making the climate change emergency worse. We need to have forced surgical sterilisation to bring the population to manageable levels.”

They weren’t alone, either. Of five online contributions, four essentially told me I was selfish for having a child in the first place. A fifth lampooned my name and appearance.

Well, gee, THANKS, LADS! Aren’t you quite the inspiring bunch? Forgive me for being so selfish.

Hmm.

There seems to be a lot of this when it comes to action on climate change. Whatabout-ery, I think they call it.

Sure, you might have sold your car but what about the fact you went on holiday abroad last year? Sure, you might eat only vegan but what about the fact you use a gas oven to cook? Sure, you might, while still a teenager, have single-handedly inspired your entire generation to rise up and put climate change on the global agenda — but what about the fact you allowed yourself to be interviewed by a BBC journalist who took a flight to conduct it?

All fair questions perhaps but, then, I can do a bit of whatabout-ery myself.

That is to say: unless the people who ask these questions live in electric-less, hand-woven wigwams, eat only foraged plants and drink nowt but stream water, what about them slinging their hooks and letting the rest of us do our bit in the rational, everyday way we can? What about that, fellas?

There is a serious point here. Such criticism — with its purer-than-thou platitudes and virtue-signalling standpoints — is the quickest way to achieve mass turn-off, when, in fact, dealing with the climate crisis is absolutely dependent on mass buy-in. Indeed, dependent on a million people like you and I making the small changes that will ultimately equate to huge differences.

Which is why, despite being a monster who brought a resource-guzzling, air-polluting, land-filling person into the world, I’m still going to try and, you know, recycle a bit more, maybe use the car a bit less, eat a bit of veggie here and there. It all adds up.

A good job Greta’s parents didn’t sterilise themselves, I reckon.